Thursday, December 21, 2006

its the holiday season!

i am guilty of not updating my blog for a month. i just feeeeeeeeeeeeel lazy. Yesterday was the long case exam of my psychiatric posting. i had to clark a case which was diagnosed as mental retardation with psychosis and depression. Talk about tough! i diagnosed the case as adjustment disorder, because the patient told me her own story. in cases like this, a complete picture of the situation is needed from the other family members. I should pass though, but when i heard of the true diagnosis, i was so flabbergasted. Just goes to show that in psychiatry, nothing is definite.
I have a month before my final end of semester exams. hmmmm, my progression is slow, and i have so many things to study. i hate the fact that i have to do case reports, research and have 2mcq papers in one posting. sometimes its a bit overwhelming. funnily though, i handle this stress by imagining that i'm smoking cigarettes. Even though i know smoking is bad, i still think if i were to try smoking, i would like it. Blame those cigarrette ads!!
After 5 weeks of posting in psych, i have come to fear psych patients less. The first time i went to the ward, i was scared of those patients, and what they would do to me if they suddenly went into a rage. but by the second week, i was beginning to enjoy myself. and i found out they are no different from you and me, and sometimes sad events in their lives made them become like that. I have encountered around 10 cases where patients lost control of their lives because of a sad past.
A few of my ex-primary and secondary school friends have married this past year. I hope they have a happy marriage, and i also hope they'll have gorgeous kids! congratulations to emily, diana thian, joyce ho, jenny jee, and josephine kueh. if its my turn to get married, i will definitely inform everyone, but pls be prepared to book your own air asia flights :)
AAaargh, i can't wait to go back for christmas. i want to see all my cousins and aunts again. the best thing about family gatherings is that i get to update my news on everyone. And get to go a bit crazy once in a while. also,i want to see how my cousins have been growing up. I haven't seen some for many years. and i miss the christmas mass in st joe's church,i hope my parents are 'rajin' enough to go for the midnite mass this year. When the choir sings carols at midnite, it always makes my hair stand, its that meaningful. It always reminds me of how special Jesus is and how grateful i am that he was born into this world for us.
Ho-hum, i am definitely getting a handphone for xmas, and i most probably will be getting a nokia,but i'm not sure what type. The worst part is having to negotiate with my parents which type to buy. Man, i hope my aunts give me some extra cash so i can spend a bit more.

anyway, here's a Merry christmas to everyone. Enjoy your holidays!!!!!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

the holiday season is here!

aloha, aloha! after a long hiatus i'm back again. just came back from kl after a month of torture. I had 3 exams 2 weeks ago, and 1 of them was a total killer! needless to say, i will most probably fail that paper,and hopefully that will be the only time i fail. next week will be my second week of psychiatry posting. the first time i went to the ward, i was scared shit of the patients, but now i'm getting used to it. The patients i've interviewed can get as normal as you and me, but with some issues. There are some really sad stories as to how some of them got there. One was this patient who had to take care of her mother, and the mother beat her up everyday to the point that she can't talk till today. Sad, isn't it? and there are a lot of terms in psychiatry. its also not that relaxing as i thought it was.

all my cousins are in kl now for the school holidays, and guess what...i am fatter than all of them!!my mum is horrified that i am not thin, but actually i can't care less. As much as i hate my boobs sometimes, i gotta admit it is nice to have some curves. I don't mind my thighs getting smaller though...and i am sad to report that one of my girl cousins is dressing up like an ah L***. sad, sad. She has a good figure, but still can't match her clothes properly yet. Hopefully she'll learn in time.Why does everyone have to be thinner than me?

This weekend was one of my best, all my family members were in town, and i got some new stuff. My bro got an ipod nano (?), the one that can play videos, tv and store photo albums from my dad. I'm so jealous! His things always seem to be better than mine. Mum just got a new honda accord. its not bad, the interior is very comfortable, and the ride is smooth, espcially when it comes to bumps. I still want a mercedes c-compressor as a ride. its just so sexy!

the family went to watch james bond at midvalley. i wasn't so enthusiastic , cos bond movies always have the stupid sexy women and the MAN that saves the world theme. but i do have to agree that it is the best bond movie in a long time, because it wasn't so slutty, there was actually good acting and because daniel craig's body is the hottest i've ever seen. I don't mind seeing him in the next bond movie actually. He's a good actor. Sigh...i want a guy with a body like that

The xmas season is coming and all the shops are busy putting up decorations. since xmas and my special day is coming up, i've thought of a few things that i might want:

1. Another swatch chrono
2. Branded sunglasses
3. A new Nokia handphone
4. Lesportsac handbag
5. Another perfume?

out of all the above, i most probably will ask for the handbag and sunglasses. Sadly, i wont be in kuching for the hols because i need to prepare for my exams. Sometimes i do think its fun to be a girl, because girls have so much fun shopping for stuff and dressing up to go out. I feel like getting myself a dress to, if my mum says yes. i haven't worn a dress since 2 years ago.

ON another note, yes, i am a spoiled girl, and my parents do spoil me and my brother terribly. They do pamper us alot, but i am grateful that i have parents who love me alot. Without them,i dont' think i would be the person i am today :) and its sad that i do take them for granted most of the time.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

my laptop crashed

its now 11.30 pm and i've just finished one report. sigh, i hate to do reports. its not so much about typing, but about What to type. And now my eyes are strained. I had been wanting to write this afternoon, but my laptop was being reformatted by a classmate. I did some internet updates which i wasn't suppposed to do, and in the end i got barred from accessing my computer. Worse, i had bought a new computer game that i was dying to try out yesterday. Can't imagine life without my comp, its my soulmate for the moment! Anyway, said classmate did a brilliant job of rescuing my comp. Not only were all my original files retained, he also added a few programs to protect me from internet viruses and spywares. I need to 'belanja' him KFC one day.
Microsoft Vista is coming out, supposedly by the end of this year,and my dad said its one heck of a program. I m supposed to get a new laptop next year. the current one is f***ing slow, and its so frustrating to see others going topspeed on their internets. I want a Toshiba. but i love my current laptop all the same, its serviced me well for 5 years, plus all my pics and songs are in here.
Has anyone realised it takes an hour to cook,but only 20 minutes to finish eating what we've cooked? Sungguh tak berbaloi! But i am proud to say that my cooking skills has increased a bit...if only a bit. I am hankering for pancakes, but my housemates are not so keen to eat it. I am also hankering for mcdonald's icecream, and some gelato. I'll have to wait to go back to kl tomorrow.
what i really wanted to write today was about our politicians. Yes...those politicians who seems to promise a lot during elections but fail to deliver, and instead build gigantic houses without permits on land meant for the poor. I've always had a thing to say against policitians, and the current national news just strengthens my belief that we malaysians are really not using our brains when it comes to choosing our wakil rakyat. Worse still, no one dares to report them when they have done something which is against the law, and these politicians just get bolder and bolder till they believe they are above everyone else. Don't blame me for not voting; i don't feel like it. and don't ask me why i shouldn't join politics to make a change. One voice can of course make a difference, but i am not willing to sacrifice so much of myself for the thousands of others. its not my destiny. but for the 1or 2percent of honest politicians out there, i salute them for doing what they do. Its not easy to be straight when everyone else is crooked. why are we so pea brained to vote for these people? Its not as if they all have Phd's or something. most of them are like you or me. Why???
Another one involves the issue of a long overdue meeting between the Pm and ex-Pm. It was supposed to be a confidential meeting, and the next day all that transpired appears on the national newspapers. I respect both of them, but i have ABSOLUTE confidence that the PM knows what he is doing, and if we give him our support and be patient, i'm sure he can make a change. Its easy to critisize, but its different when you're in the hot seat.
Another interesting article appeared last weekend, when this columnist was telling about how her relatives who migrated overseas would send her emails regarding our country and how bad things are. She wondered why those relatives have to mail her news that which she already knows of, and said that no matter how bad things are, she stays in this country because she loves it and can't imagine living anywhere else in the world. She ended by saying 'heaven is where you make of it'. I think it is true what she says. I have no problems of people migrating, that is their business and i wish them luck. But it smacks of rudeness when they start critisizing the country which they were born, and which gave them the oppportunity to migrate in the first place. I think every country has its own problems, and its up to the people to find beauty in everyday life. Sure, some things need to be changed, but our country is actually a very nice place to live in. I also take my life for granted, until i visited other countries and saw the different cultures and policies. So yea, home is where the heart is!

Sunday, October 22, 2006

happy holidays

ahh, the holidays are finally here! It was deepavali yesterday, and Seremban town was so quiet. i'm starting my mornings by waking up around 8.30 am. anything later than that and i'll get a headache. After a week of stress, its certainly good to just let things kick back and relax. I don't plan to go to kl for this moment cos my condo's empty. My mum has gone back to sarawak,and what's the use of staying in kl alone? This morning my housemates n i went to the morning market in Seremban town to buy our supplies for next week. We took a taxi there. Initially we planned to go earlier, but everyone woke up late. Its big, a 2 storey building, and ironically cleaner than the padungan market in kuching. the 3 of us plan to cook our dinners in the evening. Don't ask me what the outcome of my cooking will be, as long as its palatable we'll eat it. so far, i plan to cook chicken soup, kicap chicken, marinated pork ribs and kicap pork. AND try to fry some mushrooms in the process. We then went to eat at the second floor of the building. the hawkers there have a funny rule. they allocate themselves tables. if it so happens that you sit on their table, you must order from their shop and not from any other. its really irritating because i think as a consumer i have a right to sit where i want to. And what if the tables belonging to another hawker are all full and i want to eat from their stall? I'll have to get used to their funny rules. My housemates are pretty pissed off by the whole thing and vow never to eat there again. One shop that stands out is the Seremban beef noodle. That's the only reason why i wanted to eat there. Their dry mee is quite good. the beef soup noodles are pretty much the same as anywhere else.
oklar, i've got to read up on my paeds now.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

I'm so exhaused

Yes, this is the week of hell for me. After a day at school, i have to go back to hospital every night to clark patients to prepare for tomorrow's session. what's different is that i didn't have to do this much work for other postings. Add to the fact that i HAVE to study again after i come back, its so exhausting for me. I have to send one case summary on friday, and tonight i have to learn about the induction of labour. Oh, i can't wait for friday. Its really killing me!!!
IN the last posting, i wrote about how women suffered during a vaginal delivery, and that i vowed to myself i would do a Caesarian section. Well, i take back my words. C-section is worse than vaginal delivery. Last weekend i was on-call at the labour room and i happened to see a case where a patient, a first time mother, had to do an operation. First they cut near the beneath the suprapubic area. Then, they make the cut bigger by pulling apart the subcutaneous tissue and fat with their own hands. Imagine doing that to all the layers of the skin, including the rectus abdominis, just to deliver the fetus. whew, i'm opting for a vaginal delivery anyday,even if they have to do an episiotomy on me.
tonight i have to go back to the wards again. Its really near the festive seasons, so not many patients are in the wards. I'm expecting a baby boom after hari raya. Imagine all the expectant mothers just holding on long enough until the festive seasons are over!!

Saturday, October 14, 2006


sigh. i just recovered from a bout of constipation in the morning. If anyone wants torture me in the future, all they have to do is make me constipated. If someone were to ask me if i would rather be constipated or having diarrhoea, i'd have the latter anytime, anyday. Its just like giving birth, something wants to come out but can't come out. so you have to push and push,and in the back of your mind there's always the thought of your anus getting torn off in the process. i solved the problem by taking some concentrated fiber drink, 1 big bottle of water and 1 banana. The torture i had to go through.
yesterday evening i spent my time in the labour room at the hospital and upon arriving i was fortunate to see a patient giving birth. Its amazing to see a woman's vagina dilating just to accomodate a baby's head. and when the head finally came through, i was so worried that the vagina might tear. sometimes if the vagina doesn't dilate enough, they cut it to make the birthing process easier. I keep telling myself again and again that i don't want to have a baby. Watching a woman give birth makes me feel sick. i can't imagine myself going through such pain. After the baby came out, the placenta came out next. the nurse had to pull out the placenta bit by bit. I was excited because it was the first ever placenta that i saw. I wanted to touch it but the nurse asked me to help her with something else. the part where they had to sew up the patient's vagina after the whole ordeal was the worst. i know the pain that they feel is considerably less than during the birthing process, but still, its a needle that's going into your flesh. Worse still, i can't imagine myself giving birth to babies and doing episiotomies on patients, without anaesthesia. I have ruled out specialising in obs and gynae. Let the men handle it.
Speaking of men, yesterday a first time mother requested that her husband be by her side when she gave birth, and he didn't dare to go into the labour room! I mean, come on, you made her pregnant in the first place,can't you at least have some guts to be with her? After all,she's the one who has to suffer, not you. I tell you, if the next time my husband does that, i swear i'll go out of the labour room and "ketuk' his head. sorry guys, but all you have had to do is to donate you sperm, and there's an endless supply of where that comes from. I wished god made both men and women able to give birth. I'm really thinking of having a c-section, but it takes a longer time to heal. and i can only have a max of 2-3 kids. Gee, i don't know.
Tomorrow i'll be on call again for the whole day. the next week will be hell for me because i have to interview my patients before the lecturer arrives in the morning. so every night i'll have to be at the hospital. In the mornings i have to be in the hospital by 7.15 am. Yup, its very tiring, but sooner or later i'll adjust to it.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Obs and gynae

well,its 3 days since i've been posted to the obstetrics ward. And in a space of 3 days i've been called 'depressed' and 'lonely' by my lecturer. he's just joking of course, but its funny that i have 2 names already. i sound like a mental person don't i?
Its no secret that this posting is the busiest of all. we're supposed to know all the patients and do a lot of other clinical things besides, like doing a vaginal examination, go to the labour room and operation theatre and learn how to do a proper abdominal palpation. i always hate it during the first week of a new posting cos i have to adjust myself all over again. but i'm beginning to enjoy myself. i havent had the time to properly study yet. if you ask me about the theoretical part of obs, chances are i can't awnser you most of the time. since it is my clinical years, i would like to focus on how to be able to pick up the signs. but yeah, i know i should know a lot of stuff. sometimes i wished people don't expect to know everthing about medicine. i'm average, or maybe a little less, compared to others. true, i'm supposed to know broadly about a lot of topics, but i may not know in detail about every single little thing in medicine. i just don't have the time to read so much. even the lecturers hate to see students in the library all the time. it is true that we can learn so much from patients.
i didn't sleep so well for the first two days. i had to prepare a seminar on cardiotocography, something i'm ABSOLUTELY blank about. i had to go to the ward at night to look at the cases, then take the pictures with my camera, then prepare slides for it. i got slaughtered, but at least i did my work.
What i love about this posting is listening to fetal heart sounds, and palpating for the fetus. I feel happy whenever i can hear the fetus's heart rate, its like being given insight in to a new life, and knowing that its healthy and coming into this world.
I don't feel like getting pregnant next time (although i know this will change). the thought of my vagina strectching and the possibiliy of tears around the perineum, coupled with the labour pains makes me feel sick. If i had a choice, i'm going to go for a C-section.
I watched the devil wears prada. the clothes that anne hathaway wears are simply gorgeous. and so are the lead actors in the movie. I am completely in love with simon baker's character. Hey, i wouldn't mind a guy like that sweeping me off my feet, if only once in a lifetime! i also did some hard core shopping over the weekend, and bought myself 3 pairs of shoes. I got two sandals from vincci for 46 bucks. Not bad eh? i wanted to get some wedges, but it was too expenxive,plus my feet might be in agonising pain.
tonight i'm on call again. I want to finish clarking cases before tomorrow's presentation.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

bye-bye paeds

i had my exam this morning, and after all the studying, fretting and worrying i found out i was to clark a patient who was a newly diagnosed diabetic. i am happy that i got this case, but at the same time i wished i had the commoner cases seen in the ward aka acute bronciolitis, viral pneumonia, simple febrile fits. thank god i didn't get the more challenging cases. i would have died on the spot. i had to present to my examiner for 20 minutes. it was ok, i was nervous but i did not melt into a puddle on the floor. the worst moments were when i had to do a COMPLETE physical examination in 30 minutes flat. i was really sweating cos the cns and musculoskeletal examinations took 20 minutes alone. the remainding time i had to space out between the other 3 systems. Thank god again my patient was very accomodating and took it as some sort of game. now that its over i'm having post exam symptoms like headache, coryza and general lethargy. and i still have 2 more case reports and 2 more case summaries to write. i can't wait to go back to kl this friday and see my mum. i want to go out with her and let her spend all her hard earned cash on me :) i will be celebrating the end of exams by gorging on food. everyone's losing weight except me.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

paeds final week

it will be the 5th week of paeds, and how do i feel? sad that i'm going to leave this posting actually. when i first started out, i hated it because i couldn't stand the crying children and the difficulty in getting them to cooperate doing a phys exa. however as the weeks went by, i learnt how to be friendly with children and get them into letting me examine them. i have not gone back to kl for a month and during my 3rd week i missed my mom so much. the whole family visited me yesterday and i had a good lunch outing with them. my bro also bought me 1 big box of orange flavored chocs from langkawi. the next time he's flying down i want him to buy more biscuits for me. i can't help being a pig when it comes to food.
exam will be next thursday and i hope that i have sufficient brain memory to remember my stuff. this weekend i wanna shop for shoes. i hear there's raya sales everywhere. Shoes, shoes, i can't live without at least 5 different pairs. my ultimate purchase would be knee length black boots which i would wear with a skirt. i know i would look crazy if i were to wear it in kl. maybe i'll buy it before going somewhere for a holiday.
ramadan has started last week,and there's this ramadan bazaar just outside of my house. so far the food there is limited in choice but oklah. i would like to go to the bazaar at Ampangan. my classmate tells me they sell creme caramel for rm1.mmmm...
i also finally got net connection at my place, and i've been busy downloading tons of songs from the net. originally im supposed to be a good girl and use the net for research but i end up doing dumb stuff. the last frivolous thing i did was to check what aura i emit. it was a yellow. i don't know why i am so into this stuff like astrology, numerology etc. it just fascinates me. even though i know it can be crap and untrue,but sometimes i feel like at least 40% of what they say about me sounds true.
i plan to watch the Banquet starring zhang ziyi. its been a long time since i've watched a movie.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006


last week i had a kindof deep conversation with a friend. it was about how to ignore the people who seem to make her life hell. Im sure we all remember the times we were in school and each of us were in our own little cliques. When i told her about life in my secondary school, she couldn't believe that there were so many different characters to be found just in one place. i told her then and there that the best place to send our daughters would be to a girls school because thats where they grow up fast and learn about other peoples's characters. to me, guys are more straightforward. you know what they really want to do according to their actions. but girls...are a bit more mysterious. if i were to equate girls with an animal, id have to say a cat. i don't know. there are so many different facets of a cat that seems to resemble a woman. Anyway, i've always been able to avoid direct catfights cos i either mind my own business/ i keep a low profile/ people do not want to mess with me. My ego sincerely hopes its the latter. i do feel sad for girls who have not matured and have not grown out of their secondary school days. i dont see the point of girls making fun of other girls and acting like they're the coolest people on the entire planet. I do believe that each of us should mature according to our time, and we should learn from our own mistakes. when i was in my early twenties, i did a lot of stupid things. but if i didnt do them and regretted my actions, i would have been doing it today. and that would be majorly embarassing.

I also believe god works in truly mysterious ways. Each of us here on earth has a specific mission to do, and no matter how we stray far away from our supposed path, he will always lead us back to it. And i believe that if we do want to be useful people on earth, if we are sincere and do ask god to let us be His instrument, he will awnser our prayer, but not in a way that we expect. And i'm sure i'm not the only one who has experienced this.

And finally, even though i am a christian, i fully believe in the laws of nature and Karma, whereby whatever you do will come back to you. I dunnolah, just that i got pissed of listening to my friend's story of how she got treated by people around her.

today i went to the paeds ward in PD. we clarked some cases and presented them to my lecturer. i am still having a problem in making up the differential diagnoses for the different cases. Paeds to me is not that hard to study. the hardest thing is to take an excellent history and to be superobservant. And its true that 80% of your provisional diagnoses comes from the history taking. Whatever it is, i'm NOT interested in becoming a paediatrician. i'll stick to my dermatology, thank you very much!

Friday, September 08, 2006


I am now in the tmnet office waiting for the queue. its fantastic that they have a free net browsing service (even though its only 15 minutes). Its been a week into paeds, and so far, i have no complaints. i still feel a bit lost though, as i haven't had any case presentations yet. I made a child cry today just by standing next to her bed. how bad is that? its fun, but i dont think i will specialise in it.


Thursday, August 24, 2006

on holiday

hmph... i have had a 1 month holiday and now i'm into the 3rd week. what have i been doing?

week 1 : clean house and do all sorts of nonsense.
install yahoo games into computer and play until eyes are tired.
i highly suggest Luxor. all you have to do is burst the colored balls. i'm now in level 8 and i can't get past it!!!

week 2: went for a holiday to South africa. Was there for a week, took thousands of photos and ate seafood the whole time. I'll blog about it next weeklah

week 3: start a little bit of reading and have to complete research. i'm supposed to interview 120 subjects. Shuttling back between kl and seremban is tiring.

week 4 : have to move house to my new place which is just 5 minutes away. i dread moving stuff, especially my books.

IN the meantime, i have finished reading Stephen King's the Cell. its a great book about zombies. Anyone who has a fetish for zombies like me should check it out. I actually have no idea why i'm in love with zombies?!

Am now reading another book Wicked witch of the West. Its supposedly an adult version of the story. And i'm trying to finish The Mysterious Island by Jules Verne.

i've also tidied up my blog cos its so outdated. For those who used to use unkymood smilies, its back and you have to search under the title Punkymoods.

I also watched Siti's wedding last monday but fell asleep just as Dato' K was about to say his wedding vows. I woke up just in time to see end of the majlis. Both my mum and i think her makeup was superb. And check out her HUGE diamond 'merisik' ring. That's really BLING.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Bye bye brother

to all kuchingites who are not in kuching....did you guys know that sarawak club was burnt down on wednesday night? My grandma was woken up by the noise, it happened around 3 am. The pictures are available on Star online. Sorrylah, i'm too lazy to post pics now. It seems the entire building is gone, the only thing left are the tennis courts. Its a shame, isn't it. I hope they'll build a more beautiful club.

My brother will be changing study courses. Last month he went for an interview with MAS, and now his dream of becoming a PILOT will come true. He's going to sign some agreement with mas today, and by next week he'll be flying of to langkawi. And i think he'll start work earlier than me. As much as i think my brother can be annoying and downright sarcastic, i'm going to miss him. After all, i've bullied him ever since he was a baby. its hard to imagine him being on his own. My weekends now are going to be very boring without him.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

My first PD trip

Last saturday my mom's office organized a family day for the weekend. they picked me up at noon, but couldn't stop in front of my house because the road leading to it was blocked by worshippers from a nearby temple. its a festival honoring one of the hindu gods, and that day a lot of them were doing a procession and carrying kabbadis. so, i had to walk to the main road where she could pick me up.
the place where we stayed was the corus hotel. it has 9 floors and we stayed on the second. my cousins came along for this trip with my aunt. i was too lazy to join in the competitions so i did a little bit of studying in the afternoon. then about 2 hours later i had to save my youngest cousin from the adults. we all went swimming in the pool later on. coincidentally, this is the first time since march that i've gone swimming. thank god i still remember my strokes !

dinner was around 8pm. my mom had to give a speech, and there were a few dance performances from the office staff. the food that they served was good, and i myself ate around 6 mussels. little cousin didn't even want to touch anything else aside from musssels. I overate as usual (i don't get to eat good food during the weekdays) then sat back on my chair and watched the performances. Majority of it was karaoke done by the office workers. A few were good, and most were OK-lah (note that i am being very generous in giving my praises for this). I went back to my room around 10.30 after seeing my cousins perform with my mom. Again, i thank god i was being excused not to perform with them, it was a dance routine. I would have been jiggling my ass on the stage for 10 minutes, and its not a pretty sight ;P

the next morning i planned to swim again, but i woke up to find the pool colonised by little kids. so i took a walk around the hotel grounds. and i had to watch something gruesome. i saw this big, bad , ugly crow attacking this small little pretty blue bird. it was going for the little birds head, trying to decapitate it. and the most pitiful thing is that the bird's group was trying to defend it from the crow by sporadically swooping down on the crow. Yucks...its watching animal planet live. i didn't stick around for the crow to win.

yesterday i had a teaching session, and it was my turn to present. one of my colleagues patient, who has anxiety, depression and insomnia came to be assessed by my lecturer. No one wanted to clerk him, and i was obliged to do it. but it was good in a way, because i got a satisfactory mark from interviewing him. I think that will be the end of my clerking days, cos i gotta give everyone else a chance. Each of us is supposed to clerk a minimum of two patients.

My dad will be coming to kl this weekend and i am naturally overjoyed. sometimes its good to be the only girl in the family. The mega sale is also just starting, and here are some the things i need/want:

1. a new pair of sneakers (preferably Skechers)
2. Stephen King's THe Cell
3. A mini Jansport backpack
4. New specs (hopefully)

Mom will be buying me a new handbag since my bro says the current one looks like an old lady's bag. Why are younger brothers so irritating?

PS. I am also glad my cousin jasmine is back at home. I hope this will never happen again.

Friday, July 21, 2006


The haze is back, and Seremban is ****ing hot. I feel like i'm in Africa, especially in the afternoons. And i drink 2 big bottles of mineral water just to stay cool.

Last friday i went to buy tickets for Pirates, and i had to wait one hour in line just to buy tickets for saturday's show. But it was worth it. On saturday itself the line stretched from the GSC counter all the way to mcd's at midv. And the cinema was bloody full! and cold. I give the movie 8/10. I think johnny depp as jack sparrow is smoking...hum, can't wait for the 3rd installment. i'm tempted to watch American haunting and Lady in the water.

My 2 weeks of relaxation are over. i've now officially finished my MO and MCH week. Next week is back to clerking patients. This weekend i'm going to Port Dickson for family day organized by my mom's office. i wont be dipping myself in the beach per se, i'm happy enough with the swimming pool. BUT i do hope that there will be good food. i'm hankering for some fish and lots of seafood. To hell with my cholesterol levels! I know its bad but i can't resist.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Pirates are here!

I have an hour left before i go back to kl. i am gonna skip my plenary this afternoon (its about ethics) and i figure that i'm not so bad in the moral department. the sole reason why i'm going back so early is to book tickets at gsc midvalley for the pirates 2. i've tried online booking and sms but its all reserved. i think if i were to actually go there and buy the tickets it would be ok. this week is relaxing for me, i was posted to the maternal and child health section of the community clinic.

its interesting to see what sort of cases they have there, and also a joy to hold babies. hehehe...i've been praised for holding a baby the right way by my colleagues, so yeah. the worst thing a baby has to undergo is immunisation. i have to learn the correct way to immunize a baby, but when they start to cry and wail...i feel that my heart gets broken too. Other things i did was to palpate pregnant mother's tummy, do booking for first time mothers and family planning.

the highlight of the week was going for school visit, where we follow the schoo health van to primary and secondary schools. it reminds me back to My own schoolyears. i remembered that i didn't cry when they jabbed me in standard 1. On that particular day , it was jabbing time for the standard 1 pupils. none of them cried, and i actually got to see head lice for the first time. I feel really 'geli' to see the insects moving around a girl's head. I also examined for testicular abnormalities in schoolboys. i had to feel whether their testes was absent or not. It made me feel like a paedophile for 10 minutes.

the immunization program is really good, and i'm thankful that our government does take good care of its people. times have changed, and the immunization schedule has undergone a bit of transformation too. i wouldn't mind going to school visits when i'm a dr next time, its fun to see the school children at their most innocent.

now, i shall try my luck at buying tickets for tomorrow.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Today is 7 july 2006.

1. i had a mid posting mcq and i passed.

2. i ate a tuna sandwich for lunch

3. i played with the official university cat who is pregnant. She is also very sweet. i wished i had a cat like that.

4. i attened my cfcs meeting. it was a bit unorganized because some members were absent. i'll be going to visit my patient next week.

5. spotted a cute guy today. ehem.... and no, its not an imu student.

6. will be going back to kl today. i have been going back every weekend since i started this posting. i am not used to this.

7. feel like going shopping and buying a romance book. i swore i would never touch a romance book after form 5, and look what has happened now.

8. my skirt is now tight around my waist because i overate for lunch. i wish i had no fat.

9. heard paris hilton's single for the dozenth time this morning. the girl can't sing. but she can frolic very well

10. Forgot to clean my contact lens last night and have to wear specs today. contact lenses are so much more comfortable.

11. will be having a lecture on pregnancy later. aren't pregnant females interesting??

12. am constantly amused by the seremban chickens. did i mention that i saw a chicken in the middle of seremban town? we don't see that in kuching, do we?

13. i wish that male mange characters are actually real life humans. The world would be a happier place for females.

my top 3 manga bishonen :

1. samurai x
2. hatake kakashi
3. inu yasha

Favourite baddie: Sephiroth (FF7) and Orochimaru (Naruto)

Why do the bad guys always have to be drop dead gorgeous??

Note: i also went to the pizza hut party with my posting mates. i took a lot of pics but i still have to downsize them first before posting them up. i ate 3 large slices that night, and took a slice of chocolate walnut cake. i then waddled like a penguin because i was overstuffed!!!

Monday, July 03, 2006

first of all, i'm happy to note that my blog is still being read by other bloggers out there. from my own observation, it seems 99.99% of my readers are secret fans (just joking!!). its getting harder to blog nowadays, cos i don't have internet access at my own place. in august i'll be moving house which does have access. i'm gonna miss my old room and the house. its really comfy and BIG, complete with its own bathroom. the new place i'm staying will be with my batchmates. it'll be about 10 minutes further and i have to have transport now. the new room is just empty and i have to buy new furniture. i hate moving house, packing and unpacking and cleaning everything.

My aunt is doing a course for 3 months in kl, so i'll be seeing her whenever i go back to BJ. surprisingly, she's not the shopping maniac i thought she was. i am an acclaimed shopaholic, i just love walking around malls. there's so many things to see. i can exercise, and destress at the same time. i just wished i had more money to spend though. i even had to ask my dad to buy me stephen king's latest 'the cell' cos it was so expensive.

Family med is pretty relaxing. but i hate it when it comes to teaching sessions. last week i clerked a patient with depression and i got a scolding from the lecturer for telling a 'grandmother story'. its the first time i saw a patient with depression, and its really interesting. i don't think i'll be interested to work in psychiatry though, its just not me. Honestly, i will probably be working in the medical wards after i grad. i'm still gonnna try and see if dermatology is really my thing. and tomorrow night the students in my posting are gonna have some pizza hut party with a lecturer. its pretty funny, cos we're the only internal med posting that gets to have a party with her. me, i'm just going for the pizze and pictures.

the newspapers are still commenting about the riff between the pm and expm. i think its just blown out of proportion. i personally just want to have this issue finished with and let the pm do his job. I am also pretty sad that brazil lost to france. i didn't side any team, but i thought brazil would have won over aging france. i predict...germany vs. portugal for the finals. the samba boys were probably too overconfident that they would win.

as for england...i think it was brave of david beckham to publicly step down as captain. i think he did a good job in his 6 years. i wonder who's going to replace him. Sven goran should have been replaced a LONG time ago. they seem to be getting nowhere with him. and i think the british press are obsessed with the WAGs (wives and girlfriends) of the english players. its come to a point where you feel sick looking at their pics in the newspapers everyday and read about their exorbitant shopping and clubbing. do i sound jealous of them? maybe i am. but to me it seems like a big waste of one's life doing nothing but shopping and getting drunk all the time. Thank god victoria was smart enough not to join them.

Monday, June 26, 2006

I passed!!

Its now 2pm and i'm really hungry. i've decided to semi fast in order to lose weight. i've gained 1kg, and i was only in the 1st week of family med. today we had a long cp at the outpatient clinic. i've realised that the older patients love to talk, including telling us about their complete life story. i'm wondering how i should interrupt them , because if not the session would just drag on.

Then yesterday, i got a pep talk from my mom, telling me about my weaknessess and so on. 1 thing she kept bringing up is the fact that i'm quiet and surly. You know, i'm really not sure if its true, but i don't think i'm THAT bad with my friends and acquaintances. maybe its just how i act around my family. Yes, it is a bad trait, and yes, i am going to try my best to improve myself. Then, she compared me to a cousin, who's really hyperactive and i felt really pissed off, cos hey, not everyone is born to be an energizer bunny. i have my good days and my bad days and i do smile at people (maybe not so much compared to others). or maybe i'm just in self denial.

so yesterday, i was feeling pretty depressed about myself (body image, pychosocial, crap) and i think that everyone has their own demons to solve. true, most of us are fortunate enough to have families, to be able to study, have enough for our basic needs, but there are still some things that we are not satisfied with ourselves. i was praying today and as i was praying, i realised that God does love each and everyone of us, no matter who we are, what we do or who we look like. There's something inside each and everyone of us that he loves. Usually i ignore god for the rest of the day, but in the mornings, its my time to have a 'one-on-one 'with him.

without God, i honestly would be lost and helpless in this world. And i think that no matter what religion one practices it is still God.

Okay, Superman aka Spandex is coming to theatres this week. i am not going to watch it because i'm not a fan (not even the cartoon series). However, i have been reading naruto like mad. i have just finished manga number 262, and the lastest edition is number 313. so, i have 51 episodes to go. Can i finish it by this week? You betcha!!

A thief broke into my house last sunday. he didnt physically enter the house, but he forcefully opened one of the dining room windows. Only a digital cam was stolen,but the weird thing was, he also fished out my dad's jacket and shirt, and then carefully folded it and put it on the patio table. He also didn't take any of the expensive pens in my dad's jacket. Then, he stole one of my dad's sandals, and he also stole a neighbour's shirt. What a 'polite thief'. i told my grandma that if i was there, i'd probably slap the fella, but my gran told me i'd probably be scared shitless instead. True, i would be, but if rage overcomes fear anything can happen.
i hate people who steal from other people. God tells us to forgive others, but forgiveness is not on my mind right now.

Monday, June 19, 2006

i'm back

After a one week break, i do feel great...until my family med session this morning. A lot of classmates tell me that its relaxed, but i dont' think soooo. the days are fully packed, but there are less reports to write. and everything is so broad. its like we're learning a bit of every posting for semester 6 and seven.

i have been watching a whole lot of tv, and i finished naruto episodes 71-100 in 3 days. i love that anime. I wish i had superpowers too. maybe i'll summon a bat or a chicken. movie wise, i saw 16 blocks, quite average. i thought of watching tokyo drift, but my better sense prevailed against it. it got really bad ratings from the newspapers. superman? i'm gonna give it a go as well, i'v never been a big fan of the comic series. i guess i'm just gonna hafta wait for pirates 2. I also finished reading jeffrey deaver's latest novel, the 12th card. next up for me will be stephen king's the Cell.

Monday, May 29, 2006

ironing weekend

First of all, congratulations to all those docs who just graduated from imu and also to my batch during last saturday's convocation ceremony. i personally did not go, cos i've already had one a long time ago. if i were to go, i would have had attended 3 graduations by the time i'm 30!! At the graduation Dr francis achike, dr thani and dr jpj attended. i heard that dr thani took pictures for everyone and that later our whole batch took a picture together. Really nice...

i spent my whole saturday ironing my mother's work clothes, she didn't iron for a whole two weeks. i can safely say that i ironed around 20 pieces of clothing. Fortunately for me, there was some reward in the end. I got my first piece of silk accessory from her during her trip to china. its a blanket and its really beautiful. Did you know that if you sleep with a silk pillowcase your hair will be less damaged? i just found that out while reading june's cleo.

I went to watch x-men on saturday too. the movie was okay, but there was very little screen time for Angel. Jean Grey and Mystique's character are the best. i feel like watching xmen 1 and 2 . Watching the movie almost made me feel that i should have superpowers too. i'm undecided on what superpowers i should have

in 2 weeks time i'll be finishing my internal med posting and having a one week holiday. my aunt and family will be coming here, so i plan to do some serious shopping and visiting aquaria klcc. I love fish. I love starfish even more! Just joking... but i do remember touching a starfish when i was young, and it felt pretty good. I also plan to watch lots of anime shows and read up on as much manga as i can.

I'm supposed to have a quiz today, and thank god its postponed. i would have died on the spot if the lecturer were to do a spot quiz.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Happy Labour DAy!

i had a nice 3 day holiday during the weekend; i went back to bj to spend some time with my mom. this week on national geo they're having Bible week, and i sure wish i had astro at seremban. i am interested about the one on armageddon. death and destruction have been my staple ever since Hollywood decided to brainwash the world with its movies.

i will not deny that the gospel of judas exists, however, i do not have to believe it wholeheartedly either. and i do plan to see the da vinci code in cinema. i think its wise to see other aspects of ones religions, as it will help me to understand what people view my religion as, and how i can better help them to understand it.

anyway, im' having quite some fun in int med. i don't deny it drives me crazy, but the cases i see are akin to solving a jigsaw puzzle. and its different from surgery where you gotta think of so many things, and try to exclude them one by one. i've forgotten a lot of things during bj, so there's a lot of reading to do.

still, i can't wait for family med to start!!

and yeah, i just did my first blood sample last friday. it wasnt' as scary as it turned out to be.

am reading jrr tolkien's the hobbit during my spare time. and eating a lot in seremban while i'm at it. maybe its all the stress....

and yes, to all my friends who are in pms/ are going soon, i do miss you guys a LOT.


Friday, April 21, 2006

and now...internal med


i've just finished my exam for surgery this morning. I THINK i passed, but that depends on my examiners. There were a lot of questions i couldn't awnser, and after 4 hours i still feel like a total fool. I have loss of appetite today, but dont fret guys...i'll be okay by tomorrow.

Clinical school is so different from Bj. here, you are not only expected to go to the wards and clark patients to improve your history taking, but also have to find time to study. its pretty stressful sometimes, but enjoyable on the whole. i still have to buck up a LOT on anatomy cos it sucks!!!

i have enjoyed my surgery posting though...and i'll have to work even harder for internal med. it'll be 3 months of hard work for me, then i'll be able to relax a bit for family med. We're gonna have a feedback session for todays exam, i hope it'll be okay.

this weekend i have a lot of reports to write, so i won't be able to go back and see my family. plus, i have to learn how to read the ecg, which is no mean feat :(
i feel like watching a movie this weekend (if i have the time). Poseidon will be coming out on 11 may, so i do want to watch it. the rest...ah, i'll watch it on dvdlah. I realised i can't live without astro. since coming to seremban, i am forced to watch mainstream tv, some programs are nice, but on the whole they are kinda boring. I miss my MTV,HBO, National geographic and starworld.

I am now a fan of naruto...the characters are pretty cool, but weird. what i dont get is this boy carrying a large gourd on his back (?).

Friday, March 17, 2006

life in seremban

it is now my 3rd week in seremban. how do i feel?

a. stupid
b. tired
c. extremely stupid

i am now housemates with lali, natalia, meera and kar seng. the house where we are staying is pretty big, so much so that on the first week itself there was some sort of pseudo-robber that wanted to come in our house.

life in clinical school is a very different contrast to that of BJ. whereas i could play around in bj, here its more of getting down to business. i sort of regretted of not doing anything worthwhile during my two months in kuching, but without my break, i would definitely get burnt out by now.

my batch is divided into 3 postings, namely internal medicine, general surgery and family medicine. i am in surgery along with 2 other housemates. it is not a relaxed posting, as we should ideally start working hard during the first week itself, but i am quite happy doing this posting.

there are a lot of 'firsts' for me during the 3 weeks here; 1st time going in to the operation theatre (OT), first time seeing endoscopy, first time doing a lot of things basically. And we have to do 95% of our own studies.that is hard, because you can choose to learn everything in medicine, or learn only specific topics. and because medicine is so broad,sometimes when i think of the things i study i feel sick.

and during the first week itself, i had a culture shock, knowing what hard work i need to do in seremban, and i sometimes wonder if i had actually made the right choice doing medicine. now, i think i should be adjusting ok to life here.

a typical day in my life goes like this:

6.30 am- try to wake up from sleep

7.30am- walk to school

8 am- be in the wards to clark patients

10 am- go to ot/endo rm to see procedures

break for lunch

2-4pm -csu/plenary/discussions

5pm-drag my aching feet back home

7pm- if there is on-call , will go to on call

9.30pm- arrive home. chit chat, eat, blah blah

10.30 pm- try to rearrange clarking notes and try to study a bit

11pm- zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

it also doesn't help that the lecturers here will gleefully do their best to make you feel stupid ( they always do), but we all know their intentions are for the best. sometimes i feel scared opening my mouth to awnser a question because i know the lecturer is so vastly experienced compared to me. but what can i do, i will gladly take the humiliations for another 2years :)

1 thing good about my life now is that i TRULY appreciate my weekends. i will gladly stay in bed and loiter about the house for a whole day. and now i also appreciate wearing sandals and flipflops on weekends cos now i have to wear formal shoes all the time. sigh...........

Saturday, January 14, 2006

what i have been doing this week

Today i'm gonna visit this little tyke:

I'll be watching this tomorrow:

and i have just finished reading this book.

the shining is the most wacked out book i've read from king so far. i myself feel crazy reading what the characters think. i've been going to the Swak club gym and library, and am surprised that the librarian still remembers me. its been ages since i've been there, and the romance books are still the same ( i used to borrow them a lot). i've grown out of that, and now all the mystery and murder writers top my to-read list. my dad bought the narnia compilation, but i felt bored reading it. i guess i'm past it.

its two more weeks to CNY and the neighbour behind me is busy playing firecrackers everyday. at 7.30 pm precisely.this may sound a bit crazy, but i do actually miss the red firecrackers that they play at midnite. somehow it doesn't seem like cny without it. the neighbors are busy cleaning their houses for the big occasion.

so far, so good. i'm enjoying the hols with loads of food to eat.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

durian madness

i am seriously tired after going to both my kampungs today. i woke up at 4.30 am just because one of my grannies suggested that we should start the trip at 6 am. then in the end, she came the latest. all that waking up for nothing!

we were supposed to go to my mum's land to pluck some durians. The villagers there said that there was a lot.the trip there took around 4 hours. we stopped at Lachau on the way,and surprise, surprise, there were lots of durians! i think the area around lachau is the only one that is fruiting, cos its not really durian season in kch yet. one thing good about going to rural areas is that the produce is fresh , and there are so many things you feel like buying.

i slept throughout the journey there. when we arrived, we were told that most of the villagers had plucked the durians, except for 1 tree, cos the fruits are still too young. well, at least we won't go back empty handed. my uncle is good at climbing trees, so he was the one who was plucking it. the rest of us just stayed and looked around in the jungle. as soon as we entered the jungle, the mosquitoes surrounded us. its really scary to see the familiar black and white stripe of the aedes mosquito. luckily we brought repellent. there were lots of other fruit trees around, and me being a city girl, got excited to see fruits in the wild.

all the durians we collected were still young.we collected about 13 durians altogether. then we stopped at lachau again to buy the ripe ones, as well as a few other things. i couldn't sleep on the way back cos the road was too bumpy. the weather today was fine, and the Hose mountain range looked beautiful.its hard to imagine that on the other side of mountain lies kalimantan. so near and yet so far.

my little nephew is back home today, and screaming his lungs out. he's really cute, his brows furrow when he sleeps, like he's thinking about some hard math problem or something. btw, if anyone has watched the series numbers, the older brother don is a hottie!

Thursday, January 05, 2006

auntie sarah

i've been very excited about getting a new niece/nephew for quite some time, so today i'm officially an aunty (big round of applause). my nephew was born around 12.30 this afternoon, and tonight i got my first peep at him. he weighs 3.5 kg, pretty big for a baby.he's got lots of hair (even on his ears) and is still fast asleep right now. he'll be fit go back tmr and i can't wait to see him for real on saturday. he doesn't have a name a the moment. i wish to call him matthew surak. Surak means sunshine in bidayuh. his parents want to call him rayes kulo. They probably have their own reason.

i didn't go for exercise today cos it was raining cats n dogs. tmr i have to go to gym as well as to parkson to get a long overdue xmas present for a friend. i am going to be down with the flu soon and that sucks. am starting to gain weight due to the good food in kch.

today my grandma and i tried to make assam laksa. its not bad, pretty good. i wonder how the hawkers make the soup so yellowish. we tried adding kunyit but it doesn't do the trick. next week i'm gonna try and make popiah

i'm supposed to be studying this month but i cant seem to. i just feel like playing everyday. went to timberland medical centre and felt depressed when i saw where the specialists graduated from. im currently feeling stupid at the moment cos i don't think i've got a lot of info in my head. sigh, to be a good doc!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Christmas eve

My flight was scheduled for 3.25pm to kuching. On the same flight with me was michelle liew @ the goose. she, su jun and i took the taxi to was very hard for her to part with her close friends, and luckily at the airport we met up with sheena n gang, and also gayatri, so she cheered up a bit.

the good part of using airasia is that if you book early, you can get it for a ridiculously low price. the bad part is that if you have lots of baggage, be prepared to pay for it. as the max load is 15kg, mich had to pay quite a lot for her stuff. the crowd was crazy, but luckily the line moved fast. then we all went to mcd's. Ck held the top spot for having the longest piece of french fry ever, before premila took it and made it dissapear!

the flight we were on used the new airbus, so it was fantastic. both of us slept during the flight. the funny part was we landed at kch. you see, kch airport is in the midst of upgrading, and we were put at the last terminal. both of us had lots of things to carry. i was carrying mich's bag which contained some wooden box.

the airport floor was slippery, and mich decided to jog to the immigration counter. i naturally was short of breath. if you can imagine 2 girls carrying bags, gliding on the floor and laughing all the way, you'd think they were crazy, wouldn't you?

i think thats what the other passengers think about us. the immigration counters were so high, if i didn't wear my high heels i wouldn't see the officer at all. kinda funny being short sometimes.

then to get to the entrance of the airport , we had to go through this rabbit hole sort of thingy. it was pretty hot cos it was enclosed and so many ppl were moving about.

when i came home, it was just in time for dinner. we had a short one, cos one of my uncles had to go for mass. my own family went for the midnite mass at st joe's. the choir was the usual one, but what makes this particular mass special is that evry one is in the mood for singing. and when the whole church sings, its really beautiful. You really feel like welcoming jesus into the world. at the end of church, they had a contraption where bubble came out from the roof, and the whole church was full of it. sigh!