Its the end with a new beginning

i can't believe its a day away from a new year. time flies so fast that you don't realize it. i am still pissed with my maxis-celcom transfer. its been 6 days and i havent been able to use my 012 at all. 6 days....that's a long time and i can imagine how many smses i have yet to answer. tomorrow i am ordering my brother to go to celcom to resolve the issue. i cant go out during lunch time,its too packed. i enjoyed my christmas eve dinner with my family, i hogged all the turkey bones as usual. I recieved a case of Benefit brushes, and a benefit eyecolor package from my mother. my brother gave me a self made calender. in it he put the ugliest pic of me that he could find, and the rest of the calender was full of pictures of himself looking his best. aisey....what to do,he made the calendar himself so i just have to accept. i went back to kpg the next day....and i recorded my nephew dancing like mad to 3 iban songs. He's a cute fella, he twists his body like a cacing when he dances, its entertaining to watch.
i had my first oncall on 26th.i had 6 cases, and i didn't sleep or eat dinner cos i was kinda slow, and too many blood investigations to do. i'm sure others would have had worse oncalls than me, and the next day after work i just crashed on the sofa sleeping like a dead log. its scary and exciting to be oncall. the only thing is to be kinda careful when to inform the mo about the cases. my mo for the night got kinda irritated by midnite, probably cos i was kinda slow in doing work and he was getting sleepy. i am dreading passive call in the nursery, that place is scary.
well, whatever it is, i am anticipating new years eve, and after that its just the monotonous everyday routine of waking up early and coming back from work. i have already sorta planned my dream vacation in two years time- christmas and new years in either US or Vancouver. i miss the cold and the snow and the real xmas feeling. so i told my bro that i would like to see snow again...and i am so going to work hard and save money for my snowy xmas.

Merry xmas- but i have to work

Merry xmas to everyone and i hope you all are in good holiday spirits!! I just completed my 10 day tagging on sunday. my first oncall will be on the 26th, and boy am i scared and excited. The tagging period was very tough for me. i had about 3-4 hours sleep at night. i came to work at 5.30 am and leave at 11pm. its so tiring, and there were lots of new things that i had to adjust to. I also have to be super careful in what i do. Because the culture here is that when something goes wrong, the houseman will be the first to get the blame, and no one will cover for you. i am still slow in taking blood and doing ward rounds. but i am improving. i had a period of depression last saturday after i came back from work. i was so tired, and i x even feel happy having dinner with my family. i felt like crying and quitting my job. Luckily my other friends who started the same time as me felt the same way too. i get to go back around 5.30 everyday, which is a good thing. i don't know how i am going to survive my oncall, i just know that i need lots of coffee with me to stay awake.
I do love my job. every morning i almost always have this fresh enthusiasm to start work. Alas throughout the end of the day my mood gets spoiled one way or another. its also kind of irritating sometimes when everyone asks you a question and you are expected to know the answer, from the nurses to the patients. Paeds in kuching is okay, initially i thought it would be very bad, but so far i have adjusted to it. The cases here are less varied than what i see in seremban, but that's ok. the good thing about the wards here are that they have air-con, something which a lot of the adult wards x have. I also sleep pretty early nowadays. i tend to crash on my bed by 10pm. i have to wake up about 4.30am just to get ready to reach the hospital by 6 am. Now i know why my seniors discourage us to take up medicine. it looks and sounds glamorous, but there is SO much hard work to be done. its fine with me that you want to study medicine for whatever reason, but be prepared to be xtremely overworked for the next two years.
For xmas, most of my relatives will be coming back to celebrate it. my dad is in charge of everything, as i usually am too tired in the evenings to do anything. This year, however i x feel the joyous spirit as i was too depressed from working nonstop. Perhaps next year would be a better year for me. Have a nice and happy holiday, god bless!

starting work

I went to register myself as a government worker this tuesday. it was scary and exciting at the same time as there were about 20 of us in the room. Most were grads from russia and ukraine, a few were from uk, and 4 of us from imu. After those who were supposed to be working in sibu left to catch their plane, it was 10 of us housemans' who were going to work in kuching. We seemed to get along together, and the grads from russia and ukraine are friendly and nice. The first day was just filling up loads and loads of forms, and it took us the whole day. Then i had to rush to open up my EPF account and register myself as a new tax payee (boo!!!!). These past two days sees our group getting acquainted with the lab and the hospital. I have been posted to the paediatrics ward, and i've just gotten my HO logbook today. My god, the procedures that i MUST perform seem scary, cos i've never done them during my paeds posting. Lumbar puncture, suprapubic aspiration, umbilical vein catheterization.....i think i'll be ok in a few weeks more. Tomorrow i start tagging in the wards. Work time is from 7am til 11pm. so, i'll be housebound in the wards for the next two weeks. I went out this evening and had some fattening fast food and bought some chocs. Goodbye world. Hello sleepless nights.
I can't wait for christmas though, because its the only time of the year where i really feel like there's something worth celebrating. I have not celebrated gawai in over 5 years, so the feeling is not there. The Spring has some nice xmas trees, riverside is devoid of any. I love seeing the gifts that the body shop has to offer, it looks nice. I'm just glad i did my xmas shopping in kl, cos there are more gift packages and better offers. This will be my last post in the next two weeks. I expect myself to be like the poor guy above, starting from tomorrow nite :(

A piece of my heart

I just came back from my induction and btn today. The picture above was taken at cherating beach where we had the induction. Most of my classmates were there.

1. Induction
the induction was held at a sortof apartment hotel next to the beach. i brought my swimsuit and goggles just in case i felt like swimming. Couldn't, cos it was the monsoon season, and the swimming pool was inappropriately located. Its a boring two weeks with a very tough (and unfair!) exam at the end. the good thing is, i got to see my classmates again with all the dramas that follow them. If someone were to say that IMU C1/06 students are crazy-happy, i couldn't agree more. I have to admit that i am also crazy (in a fun way) at times. i also have to conclude that each of my batchmates have a unique personality, which makes our batch one of the most liked by our lecturers. we also had a medical officer and a med grad from pakistan joining us
the lectures were nonstop from 9am till 11pm. and the lectures were so dry that most of us fell asleep after listening for 1 hour. the only interesting and important topics were about allowances, cuti and kenaikan gaji. So i threw the rest of the file away, and pray to god that i x have to go for induction for another time.
i also managed to see a bit of Kemaman, Terengganu as its just 15 mins drive away from cherating. The keropok lekor here is soooo nice compared to the dry hard ones in kl. i bought about rm5, and can actually finish it by myself. i also went to the most famous coffee shop there and had to agree that the coffee was indeed nice. I thought the spaghetti with asian fusion was weird though....they put sardines in it.
I hated going for senaman pagi for two weeks. i usually slept late about 1pm, and sometimes even 4 am cos i had a cold and was coughing nonstop all night. I had to wake up at 6 am in the morning to get ready. And if i x come, i'll get aXed by the timbalan penghulu. its as if i was back in tadika or something. i did jog at the beach once, and its so nice to feel the sea breeze when you're running. The waves here are fantastic, and it rains on most evenings. The breakfast prepared by the hotel sucks big time, but their tea breaks are fantastic. The government spends a lot of money fattening us up. They give us 6 meals per day, the last being supper at 11.15 pm. Another thing, the coffee at the hotel tastes like tea, and tea here tastes like condensed milk.
We also had to do public speaking for 3 mins during the second week. The most touching story i heard was jenson's, cos i x know how hard his life was. After that, most ppl including me had a newfound respect for him. To be honest, its not easy being him, cos he's bullied almost everyday and he takes it all instride. I remember him during the semester 3 imu cup when his shoe flew off while he was running and the other guys stripping him down. That was really funny. He has now turned out to be one of our most liked batchmates. The exams, like i said are tough. cos the items that we have to read is like 1 big file, in just a few nights. essays and mcq's. the final day we had a sukaneka, and it was the first time i had to build a sandcastle! Pathetic, but yes, that's me. To see the sandcastles, go to facebook and click on Joy's page cos he was the official photogarapher. I'm just proud to say my castle came complete with a defense tower and crocodiles in the moat!!! At night we had a farewall dinner, and each group had to do a dance or song. My group had to do a belly dance, which was embarassing. It was a fun night for all of us, and i coughed the whole night away cos i was so tired.

2. BTN
We had to go for this gov course on the same day we checked out of induction. The journey was 3 hours cos it was in kuala lipis, hometown of siti nurhaliza. This course was for 5 days and we had to wear black and white only. Thanks to a friend of mine who went a few years ago, i was able to borrow her baju kurung. The bathroom was like a communal bath, and because i x want the other girls to see my body fats, i opted to bathe in the toilets that have a pail. its not so torturous as induction, and its slightly more interesting, like relearning high school history. They continued to overfeed us here, and the way we eat was like in military, according to groups. it did make those in the group closer to each other. Otherwise, it still was boring. My personal achievement was completing the 2km run in 17 mins as i was still coughing like hell. ANd there were 4 hills to go through. I never thought i could run for most of the course, as in the gym i could only stand running on the treadmill for 10mins. However, the next day both my knees were in pain, presumably from not doing enough stretching exercises and also the shock my body experienced from running so far so suddenly. The food here is not as nice as the hotel, but the tea and coffee is. the organisers even did repelling for us, and it is really scary to be at the top of a 40 foot building with your butt hanging in the air. We slept in a dorm, and that was really fun, cos you could chat with everyone at the same time. Sleeping and waking times were the same as during induction. I was even given a new nickname- bobohizan, for my ability to cause rain during the last day of repelling (i x want to do it cos my knees hurt). So the name sticks with me...and its not bad a nickname as the other i got from other friends. There was also another girl with special powers, she was aptly nicknamed ' kuasa mistik' . i x join jungle trekking on the last day as the bus back to kl left early. I hugged a lot of friends, and nearly felt tears at one point. I dreaded the last day because after that it will be extremely hard to see each other again. so this is what i think of batch C1/06:

All of us have our own unique personalities. Sometimes it may be hard for us to get along with each other. But at the end of the day, our batch is very united, and we all support each other in whatever way we can. It seems nothing can break up our togetherness. For that, i am extremely grateful, and happy that i got to know each and every one of you during the last 2 and a half years we studied together. Memories of our batch occupies 10% of my heart.
A lecturer in UM once told me that we should love ourselves 60%, and other people 40%. 10% out of 40% is big a space in my heart for me.
Thank you C1/06 for all the fun times, the good and the bad we shared together. I will always remember all of you.

Induksi/BTN

Its been confirmed...i will go for my induction on 17th nov. after that it'll be btn for one week, and i think i should start work on 8th december. What's more interesting is that the letter saying i need to go for induction will only arrive 2 days after this post is up. i also have to pay my own airline ticket to kl. What to do, gov is broke alredi. Of course its unfair i have to pay the ticket. even low cost airline also not so cheap once you buy late. And how to buy early cos the ppl doing induction can't really confirm the date?
I checked both the websites, and check this out....i have to get white long sleeve shirts for induction, and i need to wear long sleeve shirt when i exercise. the attire is appropriate for muslims, but can i just stick to above elbow shirts? my arms are short so there's nothing much to admire. ANother thing i'm dreading is that there is an endurance test and fitness run for btn. I HATE jogging, even though i know its good for me. i think i am going to die during the final week.

Brain-washing

In about 2 weeks time, i am going to go for my government induction. The course is about 3 weeks and will be held at a soon to be known location (they haven't sent the letter yet). the function of this course is to teach us how to become responsible government servants. this includes lectures until midnight, and some crap like jungle trekking, or team building. my sentiments about the induction is as the current title. but i do have to pass it before i can start work. the only good thing is that i can see my good friends. honestly, i wished they would just tell us instead about the important things, and skip out things which we already know, like work ethics. its one thing to know, its another thing to do it. and most people don't do what they preach.
I've also had to look at my books again in anticipation or working. Its scary to think of doing morning rounds, getting grilled by the specialists in front of everyone and getting scolded for a lot of things. I love my (future) job, and i wouldn't want to do anything else in the world. Unfortunately, that involves me getting a very thick skin.
I've also been doing a lot of house cleaning this week, and i'm glad my house isn't such a mess anymore. I've also been doing lots of driving. To my dismay, i find that kuching drivers are just as bad as kl drivers. the only difference is that we are more patient, and we rarely blare the horn. Take yesterday, for example. i was in the slow lane behind a proton saga car, and we were on the way uphill to sarawak club. That car suddenly stopped at the turning to the club, without any signal. A motorcyle nearly rammed behind the car. it stopped there for 30 seconds, and i didn't know what the driver was thinking. There were lots of cars behind me. Finally the idiotic driver turned into the club. If i were bitchy i would've just blasted the car horn at the driver. but being a slow and patient kuchingite, i decided to let it go. i turn into the right lane as i was too close to the car, and i was unable to reverse back. That's the worst scenario i faced. Kuchingites love to show their signals at the VERY last minute they're about to turn into a lane. Like one of my friends commented "They are really stingy with signals". Another time i came back from my aunt's house in Semariang, and i was on the left lane. i had to suddenly brake because just ahead of me there was a group of men arguing and i saw a motorcycle that looked completely destroyed. My dad commented that it could have started from an accident...with both parties calling their friends for help, and escalating into a huge row. I am afraid of motorcyclists, especially if they are males, so i let them go first at the traffic light. Sometimes, the drivers here are so bad, you literally feel like bashing their heads with the car lock. Like yesterday, the number of cars i spotted which were illegally on the wrong lane were about 5. That's a lot of a town like this.
I've seen the movie Tropic Thunder, and it was so-so for me. I liked Robert Downey Jr's role, he was quite funny. I can't wait for the bond movie to show on the big screen. I am avoiding Max Payne, because the movie reviews were just so bad.

There's 1 song i like by our local artist Melissa Indot. Its called starlight, and its such a joy to listen to this song on a sunny morning:

this second song is called chantek, by altimate. pretty sweet song.
I like the song Selalu Denganmu, originally performed by Tompi. it has also been sang by Atilia (whom i really like). I love jazz, and i've tried finding for Atilia's album in kuching, but no success yet. i wanted to load the videos from youtube to this post, but for some reason there's always a problem when i cut and paste the code. so you guys have to go there yourself la...

Langkawi and Kedah revisited

Last week i went for my brother's graduation in langkawi with my whole family. We stopped at kedah first as my grandma had never seen the place. Travelling via the LCCT was hell as it was just after the hari raya hols, and many people were still going back to their respective homes. We had to wait for half an hour for the luggage, the conveyor belt was short and people were just pushing each other to get their luggage. Then, while waiting for the taxi some rude middle aged man decides that he can cut other people in the queue just to be first. Why can't the taxi operators let people line up for their turn just like in KLIA?? Nobody dares to cut the line there. Worst of all, that idiot has a smirk on his face as he went off first. Just makes me feel like scraping his face against the tar road so his skin will abrase and peel off. I swear, only at LCCT can you see malaysians at their very best- being kiasu. Like yesterday, when we were ordering food at asian fusion, some guy decides to cut in front of the person standing at the paying counter. I mean, if you are so worried that you will miss the flight, don't eat then!! Go to McD's and order takeaway, or eat some sandwich at the departure lounge. Asian fusion also has the highest number of flies within the LCCT. I am hoping the flies are around because of the kelapa sawit plantations. Some of flies were also present in my aircraft yesterday, literally flying with us to its new home, kuching. God, i hope LCCT can be refurbished for the better. Just because we are flying cheap, doesn't mean that we should expect bad services at the LCCT too.

In Alor setar we visited a number of places. The first was Dr M's house, which was maintained in its original state. I find him a very intelligent man. On the walls of his house were articles that he had written when he was young under his psudonym Che' Det. The topics ranged from Malay culture to politics. It also chronicled his life story until today. I think no matter what one thinks of him, i will still say he was one of the best things that UMNO, and our country could have (despite any mistakes he might have done). We visited the padi museum, gunung keriang (for its crystals) and also pekan rabu, where they sell traditional malay food. The city is very laid back, and its people are generally nice. I just hate having to wear jeans all the time because i like wearing shorts when i go out. Since Kedah is PAS-led, i had no choice but to wear jeans. In kuching, i can go apek-style anytime i want to. yesterday morning on the way to the airport, i managed to see the sunrise. it was very beautiful, especially as the image was mirrorred by the paddy fields. It was the sort of sunrise that made me feel like everything was ok in my world, and it was a fresh start to life.

In Langkawi, we didnt' do much . we went up the cable cars to some gunung. it wasn't high, about 700 m above sea level. The cable lines ARE as steep as they proclaim, and during the ride in the car i keep thinking about what would happen if the line suddenly snapped and i fall to the forest....Unfortunately the hanging bridge was closed for repairs. The view of langkawi and its islands were beautiful, we could even see thailand's islands to the north. we took pics of the sunset at Tanjung Rhu (which were very beautiful) and had lots of seafood during our 4 day stay there. Langkawi was unbearably hot as the monsoon season was over. My parents did a lot of crockery shopping. I went crazy over durian chocolates and Jules Decortes biscuits. My grandma, not surprisingly, bought a ton of minyak gamat. Last saturday, all of us came to see my brother get his wings. There were only 24 of them, and all were male. The juniors came to fill in the attendance, and i only saw 2 female pilot trainees among them. As in every sort of graduations, you have the excellent, the average and the bad. One student who graduated couldn't even read a map, and i'm not kidding you. Makes you want to pray for a capable pilot the next time you're in an aircraft. But hey, he's the only one. the rest are average students. Now these new pilots should start to train for their conversion to larger aircraft in november in kl.

Kuching stagnation

Hello....its been a month since i wrote something. I'm currently vegetating at my house, doing nothing but playing my computer games, eating and sleeping. and swimming, getting tanned like a lobster and driving. Yes, i am relearning my driving skills. This is currently my 2nd week into my driving lessons. I am being taught by a guy who's about my age,and who has a liking for long fingernails (aka Phua chu kang). He's a nice guy though. He asked me to start driving around town on the 2nd day itself. so far, driving around is not a problem for me. the only thing is when i am at the traffic light i tend to release the clutch too early, hence the car just goes dead in the middle of the road. Another thing is roundabouts. Kuching still has a lot of roundabouts, and the one at Padungan is especially tricky to negotiate. I won't be surprised if mr instructor gets a mini heart attack one day. Yesterday i learned how to park. I hate reverse parking. especially the one where i have to adjust the car so its equally balanced on both sides. I haven't done side parking yet, and tomorrow i have a 2 hour lesson.
Last week a couple of friends came to kuching for a holiday. On the first day itself, we went dolphin watching at the mouth of the Sarawak River. we had to kayak and it was my first time. It was a good experience....and that's where i got my legs fried. we were in the sun from 9am til 2pm. Then we had a swim at the beach (pasir pandak) where one of my friends got attacked by jumping prawns...yea for real. Thinking about the Attack of the Prawn episode never fails to make me laugh. Second day we went to Bako national Park. We were dropped off at one of the beaches. The beaches at Bako are SUPERB. They are not the muddy beaches that you normally get around kuching area, and they sea is crystal clear there. The trails are good, and i got a workout in the jungle. i also managed to catch glimpses of the proboscis monkeys. They are shy creatures. Everytime we got close to them, they backed away. Its just like watching Nat Geo live. The park facilities have been upgraded, and there are less bearded pigs and macaques at the headquarters (yay!!).
Third day we went to Semenggoh to see the orang utans feeding. That was good in itself. I also brought them to see Damai Beach (i miss it a lot). We also went to the museums around kuching city.
I've also been swimming almost daily at Sarawak Club. The pool waters are just nice, not icy cold like at vista. I've been trying to redo my freestyle strokes as i usually swim using the breast stroke.
I've got my offer letter to work with the government, and i should be working in November itself. Its scary, working for the first time, especially if one is a houseman. Sigh....i'm going to enjoy myself while i can. By the way, i've added a new site about my travelling experiences. its labelled MyTrips, under the heading other blogs.

Holiday mode

Hey guys, i finally found time to write a bit after going off for so long. I had my graduation on august 23rd (finally), i went off for a short trip to bali, went to kedah to help my mom move there, went to langkawi for a night's trip to see my brother, going back to kl tomorrow, and coming back to kuching on this tuesday.
My bali trip was GOOD. Hectic, but good. i was there for 5 days, and there was so much to see and do. stayed at a hotel right in front of kuta beach. Won't talk much about it cos i plan to set up postings dedicated for my trips.
I had a hell of a workout cleaning up and arranging my mom's new place in kedah. it was tiring, and i had diarrhea from my bali trip. but that did not stop me from enjoying kedah food. its true, the further up north of malaysia one goes, the more tastier food is. I also had a blast in langkawi buying loadsa stuff, got myself a new sunglass and plenty of cosmetics...heehee! I also bought quite a few pc games and anime for my relaxing pleasure. My brain has also been 'dumbed' by watching movies on cinemax and star movies. i dont even remember what the titles were. I feel so bad because i haven't had the time to meet up with all my old friends. i promised them i would meet them in kl after i graduated, and i just don't have the time to do so. After coming back to kl tmr, i have to clean the place also and pack up all my things to be sent back to kch. hectic and busy.
I'm currently reading a book called 'rich dad, poor dad'. since i'm going to start working soon, i figured i need to invest all my hard earned cash in the right places. my short term target after 2 years of housemanship will be to go on a trip to vancouver and alaska. Since the ringgit's value is set to drop even further, i have to really be prudent in my spendings. What i can't wait to have once i start working though, is my very first credit card!!! I'll start with having one for the time being. The only thing is which credit card to have.
I plan to watch 'babylon ad' once i come back to kuching. there is no cinema in alor setar. i think my mom is going to be dead bored. I can't wait for my brother to graduate next month. I can't imagine him flying a plane. Its pretty unbelievable for me that my really young brother is about to be a pilot. Better yet, i can't wait to embarass him on his graduation day :P tomorrow i have a 6 hour trip by bus to kl, i hope puduraya will not be so crowded.

its all about phelps

so its been one week into the olympics, and i am totally hooked on the games. i find handball, track n field, swimming and gymnastics to be totally addictive. i am also glad that chong wei made it to the finals for our country. its gonna be hard for him to beat li dan (?) but if he does, i salute him. i watched table tennis yesterday and it was a good game between korea and singapore. if i'm not mistaken the lions won.
Other highlights:
1. bball between china and usa
2. womens all round finals gymnastics
3. handball

And as usual, whenever swimming is on any of the olympic channels i have to watch. with a guy like phelps, i can't help it:



second to phelps in the hotness category is his teammate ryan lochte.

I also managed to see women's diving, and was really impressed with the chinese duo. our malaysian team managed 21st place overall, but its a shame we counldn't get through to the finals. Whatever it is, i'm hoping phelps gets his wish come true :)

My graduation is next week, and i've picked out the outfit to wear. I haven't bought the heels yet. i really want to go to isetan klcc, but my mum is just too busy cleaning up the office. i so love esprits new fashion range. i have given up wearing levi's jeans, though. their jeans seems to be smaller and smaller. its for girls who dont have hips :( i'm now converting to the padini and marks and spencer brand as its more comfortable. I also have to sort out the books that i plan to ship back to kuching. and i havent met up with any of my old school friends yet. i feel so guilty.

i have watched star wars: attack of the clone wars. its 3/5, its okay, but not much in the story line. to be honest, i;m just waiting for KOTOR the game series to come up with a new one, but they haven't done yet. i plan to watch death race starring jason statham next week. the plan is to enjoy myself to death before i start working, hehe. AND, i'm still in negotiations with my parents as to what car i will drive once i work.

Olympics

Since the olympics started, i have been vegetating in front of the telly almost everyday. The opening ceremony was fantastic, but i slept throughout the procession. so boring.
I watched michael phelps blazed his way through the 400m medley. i so hope he gets his wish to get 8 gold medals. I also enjoyed the us vs china basketball game. Poor china was outclassed by the us. Those guys shoot perfect 3 pointers (thus getting past yao ming) and were too fast for the china players. still, i hope the finals would be between these two countries again.
I saw weightlifting today, where a 17 year old china boy created a world junior record (he was pretty cute too). Malaysia finished 9th. And last i heard, our archery team failed to win a medal.
I dont' get it. if countries like vietnam, thailand and indonesia can get medals during the olympics and not just from badminton, why can't we? i find it so frustrating to watch a malaysian athlete perform, waiting with anticipation that he/she might do well. instead, they are always at the middle or last of the standings. I wonder what's wrong with our sports system. the only thing we can always count on are badminton. I mean, there are countries that are poorer than us and they don't even have good training facilities, yet they can perform well. I find this so embarassing.

A chapter of my life has ended

so.....it has been a month since i've blogged. i've finally passed the final exams and my graduation will be on august 23rd. its been an interesting 5 years for me. THis was the hardest of all the exams i had faced. I had to finish typing portfolios a week before the finals.. i had to move out of my rented house and bunk in my friends house for a week, and i had to study EVERYTHING in a short span of one week. it was just study, study and reading nonstop from morning til night. There were times when i just wanted to go and sleep at 10pm. But the thought of not reading a lot of stuff kept me going through.
We had to go back to seremban a day before the exam. On the way, my friend's car broke down along the highway. It was towed to the nearest toll plaza. We had to wait in the hot sun for two hours for her parents. And we tried to study a bit during those 2 hours. Believe me, i was cursing the heavens for all the bad luck i've encountered during my stay in BP. And to top it all off, there was bird shit that landed on my beloved oxford handbook while i was reaing, on the lung cancer page. I only felt slightly better after someone told me bird shit was considered to bring luck.
we set out from bp at 10am and arrived in seremban at 5pm. I took a break for an hour, then had to squeeze whatever info i x have into my mentally exhausted brain. i didn't even have time to read most of my portfolios. In the exam room, i had a case of AECOAD....which was my portfolio case...which i discussed rather deeply. Nice stroke of luck eh? And to top it all off, both the examiners for my long case and portfolio discussion were all my lecturers, no external examiners at all. You guys don't know how i felt after that. I was sooo relieved, and kinda happy that god still loves me after all.
I did my oath taking on friday, and managed to get a lot of pics with my lecturers and friends. I still x feel anything right now, it just feels that i am on another school holiday. but its great i passed, cos i am pretty old now and its time for me to start working. My parents were pretty nonchalant that i passed, but on the plus side i can ask them to buy some of the stuff that i want. I need a new wardrobe, new shoes, need to fix my ipod, need to read lots of novels, need to enjoy myself. Induction will probably be in october, so i might start working by November. God, that is another scary thought.

Raindrops

Its 8am and i'm feeling half sleepy. It was raining from last night until now. Some people love rain, some just hate it. I'm in the former. There's something about rain that just mellows me. I love waking up to the sounds of rain, happy that i can curl up in bed and sleep til' it goes away. Rain also reminds me of Kuching, and my home. Kuching gets tons of rain yearly. I just love it when i see overcast clouds and cool weather upon my skin. And when it rains, sometimes i will just sit outside my house patio watching the rain and the wind that comes with it. Perfectly romantic, i tell ya :)

Morning Rain by Tu Fu

A slight rain comes, bathed in dawn light.
I hear it among treetop leaves before mist
Arrives. Soon it sprinkles the soil and,
Windblown, follows clouds away. Deepened

Colors grace thatch homes for a moment.
Flocks and herds of things wild glisten
Faintly. Then the scent of musk opens across
Half a mountain -- and lingers on past noon.

I've got 3 more weeks in BP. Time flies fast, doesn't it? If i do pass, i'll be back home,hopefully. Some ppl may be asking why i wanna work back in kch, and not in Semenanjung? The reasons are fairly simple. First, i am EXTREMELY close to my family, extended and all. That is where i belong, and i can't ever imagine being far away from them. Second, i really need emotional support when i start working. CAlling them whenever i feel down is not the same as seeing family members in front of me. I know i'm an adult, i should be independent, yadda yadda. But....i'd rather be with them and enjoy in the moments of NOW. Rather than me being far away and not being there when they are still around. Thirdly, both my parents and brother are not in kuching, and won't be for a few years. I"ve got the house and my grandma to take care of. Fourth, i LOVE kuching. IF there are 2/3 of rotten people at the workplace, its still better than working in Semenanjung with the same ratio of 2/3 of rotten people. At least i get my seafood, Pok Mee, Kolo Mee, Tomato Mee and Sarawak laksa while i'm working here.
I really need to do some intense workout ASSUMING i do pass. I still remember my graduation photo after finishing UM. My face looked so ROUND. I was thinking of swimming in the mornings, and going to gym in the afternoons. I would really like to have a good graduation photo of myself, i would like to avoid looking moon faced this time. BTW, i hate having a round face. if only i had an oval face.

Its a durian world

The fruit season began a few weeks ago. Along the way to my house in BP, there are a few fruit stalls. Usually they sell the usual stuff like apples, melons, oranges (which i hate, except for the lokam). Then, i saw the durian, rambutan,longans. Its hard for me to resist all 3 so last friday, i persuaded my housemate to stop at one of the stall s. I will admit that i don't know at all how to choose good durians. Usually when i see my grandma, she'll first sniff it, then tap at it a bit, then finally looking at the stem of the fruit. if the stem is neatly cut, its too young. if it looks jagged, then u can usually confirm the fruit fell on its own. Me?? i just have to rely on the fact that the shopkeeper won't cheat me. I bought 3 durians for rm 35. 2 were kampung, 1 was kacukan. AND, its all good. I had a tub full of durians. I've been eating them for breakfast, and now, only a few are left. God, i can't live without durians. My mom thinks my craze for durians started when she was pregnant with me, and she was eating a LOT of durians that time. Hehe, i don't care if its true or not, i'm just glad i love it. A lot of my cousins, including my brother HATE the smell, and it'll be usually me,my cheese eating young girl cousin and the older family members enjoying durian. BUT the absolute nicest tasting durians for me are the wild durians. they are the hardest to come by. I can only remember eating them when i was really young. I haven't seen wild durians sold for ages. Perhaps when i come back home i'll try my luck. I also think kampung durians are so much better than the genetically modified ones.
Its about 5 weeks away and i'm still busy doing portfolios. Damn it, i hope i just pass the exams. i'll keep complaining about the exams until a week away.
I've watched Kungfu Panda, i give it 7/10. I've also watched the HULK, and it was so much better than the first one. Ed norton just sizzles as brucey. I also love the romantic scenes between him and liv. Watching this movie, i had pity for the hulk for the FIRST time. Usually i just see him as this anger losing green guy who uses it as an excuse to destroy things. and the ending.....can't wait for the sequel to happen (yum Tony STark!!).

KPG angkat is done and finished

so last weekend i went to do some community project at a supposedly rural village. This was what i did:

1. Do health screenings for common health problems in the morning
2. Become a facilitator for some motivation course in the afternoon
3. Watch performances at night
4. Cook for the entire IMU population on sunday morning
5. Go back to civilisation on sunday afternoon

Problems i encountered

1. The need to go to toilet on Saturday morning

The bus had to leave IMOO at 6 am (we were told to be there sharp). I woke up at 4.30am just to make sure my bowels moved and were emptied by then. Problem was, bowels refused to wake up and only moved at 6 am. So poor me had to hold it all in until we reached the place. I only managed at 10 am that morning. For me, one of life's pure tortures is when i can do my business in the morning, cos then it'll be constantly at the back of my mind. its worse when you eat something spicy the night before. :(

2. No cellphone coverage. I know i don't have anyone to call (Boyfriendless and all) but still, it feels good to know you are connected to civilization. The kampung was only 30 mins from town, but no coverage!! How can!!! Even the jungles of Sarawak got cellphone coverage!!!!!!

3. Hot weather.
We were told to wear only black shirts. Which made sense cos we don't wanna stir up trouble wearing white or see through or skimpy bikinis. Heaven forbid us if we cause some villagers to have a stroke or heart attack. But its freakin'hot in Malaysia and my face was full of oil by afternoon. I use 3 oil blotters to clean my face.

4. Motivation course??
Yes, i was a facilitator, and i did get excited by the idea of counselling students about what their future options are like after secondary school. We ended up playing a lot (too many) games though. And i'm not really sure how the older school children felt about that. It was beneficial for the primary school kids though. Maybe they should have had separate programs for the older and younger kids.

5. Culture nite
Being the vain person that i am, i decided to wear this nice pink baju kurung of a friend of mine. This will probably the first and last time i'm gonna wear one, and the thought of looking nice while cam-whoring excited me. Alas, not many people chose to wear something fancy, so i really felt overdressed. Still, i do have good pics of myself :)

6. Cooking for the whole kampung
This was really tiring. I cleaned the chicken, chopped and hacked onions, long beans and had to fill the 'dulang' with food. It doesn't help that some people think that the food we cooked was disgusting, just because it was cooked in the kampung. There were not many people helping, and we were talking about cooking for 300 people. Still, the villagers really made yummy food.


What i loved:

1. My adopted family
THey were super nice. THe makcik who took us in gave us her own bedroom to sleep in. The only thing was there was this really big cockroach like insect which flew around the room. We had to ask the older brother to kill it for us. And they fed us nonstop with yummy kampung food. I have to give credit to the Malays in general, they are really hospitable and friendly people. Their hospitality knows no bounds. Imagine if you were to let people into your house, and not knowing how they feel about the whole thing. Kudos to all of them who volunteered to take us in. And for me, i got a few new recipes about cooking kampung food. YUMMY

2. Cultural nite
i did enjoy myself. WAthcing all the kampung people come, and all the karaoke songs (some good, some bad) and performances by our own students, i think it was a blast. Even some of our lecturers were enjoying themselves, letting loose of all that stress at work. I did a lot of cam-whoring. But by 11pm, i had to go back cos i was too sleepy.

3. Sukaneka

this is like a sports carnival, and all of us, lecturers included, let loose. there were a lot of funny events going on, but the thing is, everyone had fun. i missed the tarik tali event though. i would love to tarik tali, i've been doing it since i was in primary school and its so fun. its bad to lose of course, but the adrenaline is sky high. still, i did learn how to become a better cook that day :)

4. Good experience
We had to have this thing called 'makan dulang'where 4 people share one big tray of rice with assorted foods. its not for everyone though, and i understand. But dont'ever talk about going to experience life in rural africa, rural india or joinning doctors without borders if even the thought of sharing food with others makes u icky. i did feel icky myself, but after preparing the food myself and seeing how they eat (everyone takes a corner of the tray for themselves) its not that dirty. just have to lose that city life a bit. And i think this will be the first and last time that i think i will experience something like this. So, it was a good exposure for me to see how other people live.

PS, i took a lot of pictures, but am too lazy to post it in my blog. PIcs are either on my friendster or facebook. Lots of camwhoring by me and pals. :P

Friendships that last

I decided to end my bimbotic ramblings for a while and talk about my friends. This was inspired by a few events that have happened this week. Nope, it does not involve IMOO people at all.
We all know that girls are from Venus, men are from Mars. And how girls and guys make friends and maintain their friendships are quite different. I prefer girl friends over guy friends, simply for the reason that i feel i can open up more to them. There are some guy friends that i am quite comfortable with, but its just not the same. This week, i felt pretty stressed out. Why, i don't know. See, when i don't have my usual outpourings to friends, i feel that things, or events that have happened get walled up and are threatening to burst out. But, who to trust in this small world? so, i do understand that for some people, blogging is a great way to speak out what you can't say to other people. of course, a little indiscretion is necessary if a lot of people are reading your blog.
Anyways, life here has been hectic. i have 8 weeks to exam, and i havent prepared at all. That keeps nagging me. Another thing is, with portfolios and the need to constantly remember things that have eluded me, is another drain. Not to mention my allergic rhinitic nose which makes me have a mini-flu everyday.
At 6 am yesterday, i was woken up by a friend who was afraid for me. She thought that some organization was out to get her, and told me that i could be the next target, as all her other friends have had their car scratched, broken into and things stolen from their houses. Then she tells me that i'm the only one she trusts as said organization is everywhere. And FINALLY, she said that she had a medical condition but didn't want to take her meds. Now, i was happily sleeping at the moment when she woke me up. i thought it would be just another one of her complaints where she was dissatisfied about life. Boy, she made me freaking scared yesterday,and as a result my mind was jumbled up the entire morning.
I should have asked her to continue taking her meds, but she has poor insight. The other thing is, she is currently disconnected from her family members. i don't know how she is going to cope. But i know that when i come back to kuching permanently, i have to sort her out. I just hope she will not be in denial by then.
So, yesterday, after feeling stressed out the entire week, i went online in the hope that some of my friends would be around. Turns out not 1, but a few of them were online, and i had the best time of my life yesterday evening.

Verdict: Its easy to make lots of friends, but true friends that stick around you for more than 10 years and who are loyal to boot, are damn hard to come by.

I think this post is a way of saying my thanks and gratitude to all my friends who have been in my life since primary school, and who stuck it with me thick and thin, who never fail to give me support and to make me laugh.

Pretty sappy eh? But when you've gone through and seen so much, its small things like these that make life bearable.

Movies...movies and Jolie

the first movie that i will mildly review is Narnia 2: Caspian. i watched this with the squid about 2 weeks ago. the pace of the movie was good, there were not many boring scenes and there was 1 really hot guy to keep me entertained, aka Ben Bar-ness (that's how squid sez it). Apparently Ben Bar-ness was in a short-lived boyband before he had his hand in acting. what i find funny was that the Telmarines had this spanish accent. Just because all of the Telmarines had dark hair, they just HAD to have a spanish accent eh? How about Mexican? Another thing was that the fighting sequences of the movie were heavily borrowed from lord of the rings. They could have showed a bit of originality-lah. ANd there was a lot of reviews that there were too many christian related themes in the movie. Well, there are some slight references to christ, the obvious was when the older children couldn't see Aslan, and only Lucy did because she still believed in him. But thinking of Christ in the form of a very handsome lion, not bad i say. overall, i gave it 7/10 cos i did enjoy myself watching the movie. Oh yes, and Ben Bar-ness too





The other movie that i recently watched was 'The orphanage' in kluang parade, of all places. we were there for yet again another visit. but the hospital was having some accreditation thingy so we had about two hours to kill. FYI, the cinema in kluang was better than in bp. the one thing that amused me was the decor of the cinema. the overall color was red, with jukebox sort of lights as u enter the cinema itself. It really reminded me of some old school karaoke parlor. I bet my ass the interior designer who did the cinema was also the interior designer for karaoke parlors. I give the orphanage 6/10. the movie was scary, and the acting was good. what i didn't like was the ending. I guess everyone wants to be like M. Night Syamalan nowadays and give it a twist to the ending so everyone goes 'ooooooooh'. Well, i love my scary movies to be REALLY scary movies, like ppl getting killed by a ghost in the end, or the human actually surviving the ghost attack. there was one spooky character in the movie though, and he's called TOMAS.




EEK........if u EVER see this boy in ur house (or ur dreams) u know ur time is up.
I did want to watch this thai horror movie Long Khong. it was supposed to be shown on that day, but for some reason the cinema couldn't screen it. i LOVE thai horror movies, most of them are really good, and really spooky. Second would be indonesian, and third Korean. I've actually not watched korean and Jap horror movies for a long time because their ghosts are ALWAYs long haired women with no face that either crawl or slither towards you. Why can't they have other types of ghosts. Asia is just full of ghosts. take our country for example. i bet my ass there are about 100 different types of ghosts. be a little bit original lah.

and this is THE hottest angelina jolie pic i have seen:



Man, her face is so perfect. Sorry to say this, but jennifer aniston just doesn't stand a chance against her. She's smart, sexy, and dangerous to boot.

Lastly,i was watching Roll Bounce on Astro. it starred Mr. Mariah Carey (NIck CAnnon) and Bow wow. tHe movie was very funny. What i loved even more was the soundtrack, and in particular this song. I can just groove to this song the whole day. Seventies rock!!

Indy reviewed

i had my cfcs viva yesterday. its basically me and my student partner helping to take care of a patients medical problems. it went well yesterday. 15 minutes passed by so fast. what was worse was that i scribbled on my report using blue and green marker pens, and i didn't know that i had to pass it back to IMOO again after i finished viva. so i had to tell the lecturers that i scribbled something....luckily they didn't mind at all. and because i had to wind down after a day of stress, i went to watch the latest indiana jones movie



i give the movie 7/10, ok but not good. the ending sucked for me. i thought with all his experience spielberg could have had a better ending for his movie. the good thing was, it brough back all my nostalgia for the earlier indie movies. i did remember watching all 3 movies while i was young. i think my favourite was raiders of the lost ark. i dont'remember how indie's father died though. another interesting thing they put in the movie was siafu ants. my friend was telling me no such ant exists on planet earth. i agree....no ant is crazy enough to eat a russian baddie...but i did remember a documentary about fire ants in africa exactly like the one in the movie. the ones in africa are welcomed by the Masai warriors of kenya because they help to eat all the crop pests. but woe behold anyone or anything that comes in their way. i do not like those ants. i don't mind the malaysian red n black ants, but not those crazy african ants.




uugh. i know its nature, but imagine what it can do to a human. this is also exactly why i do not go into the jungle. i really wonder how tribes living in the jungle can avoid these sort of ants, and they are partialy nude and barefoot.

and finally, here is dj Tiesto with Traffic:



This is one of the very few club songs that i like. the other is Moby's 'i love to dance' but i can't find a nice video for that song.

Flickr

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

im back from kl

there it is folks. i'm back in sleepy boring BP after 5 days in KL. i felt sooooo happy going back last friday. no ward rounds, no nothing to do. it took us 4 hours to go back to kl via the Yong Peng highway. We stopped at Ayer Keroh for a lunch break. That place is huuuuuge. The weekends was spent going to shopping malls, specifically midv. my mom just loves that place. Oh yeah, for mother's day, i just got here a few roses, since she likes that flower a lot. But,as i am going to work soon (hopefully) she has already started telling me what she WOULD like for next year's mother's day. A crystal tree. Costs about 400+. eh, its fine by me. i am thinking of getting a credit card once i start working. Not that i plan to max it out completely,its just for emergency purposes. There were no sales at all, i came to kl too soon. Sales will only start at the end of the month.
What i did do this weekend was to watch Iron Man.......starring the absolutely yummy Robert Downey Jr. He really suits the role, and i hope there will be a sequel to iron man. The movie has a good script, hot hero and some funny scenes in between.



Yes, folks. Robert Downey Jr can certainly rock my world anytime he wants to :)

I read that since the response to the movie was so good, they are thinking of making an iron man trilogy.

The next movie i'm planning to watch is Narnia's Prince Caspian. I just hope its slightly better than the second one.

I also went for some foot therapy last weekend. My mom and i tried some Fish spa, its those little fish that nibble on your dead skin cells on your foot. It cost us 38 dollars for half an hour. There are different levels of the fish spa. you progress from the little fish to the big fish, and there are a few pools for you to soak your foot in. My mom and i stuck to the little fish, because its VERY ticklish when they start chomping on your feet:













Picture 1: i'm just starting to put my feet in the pool
pic 2: fish start coming my way........
PIc 3: Attack of Dr fishies
Pic 4: More feet= less tickly feeling

I would still do the fish spa thing again,its fun and it really does make my feet look good. I also went for a facial, and it HURT LIKE HELL. The lady said there was so much gunk in my face. i swear that i'm getting more pimples in BP. Could be because its so hot here. ugh, i'm on holiday for 5 more days, and i have to finish most of my portfolios by next monday.

Birthdays to remember

Yes, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to these people who are/have celebrated/r celebrating getting a year older...........

DIDA OFFICIALLY 27
BRAIN OFFICIALLY 27

PAPA OFFICIALLY 56 AND RETIRED

heh, i just thot of making it in capital letters to show how important they are. Dida dear, i AM going to see you next monday, so be prepared to sleep late. Brain.......come back to kuching next year!! i shall be home by then.

dad turns 56 today, and i just love it when i wish him happy birthday. he seems so happy that i remembered him getting a year older (actually i forgotlah.... but my mum called me just now to remind me). Do i love my dad? u bet i do. he's the only one that will spoil me to bits. my mum is strict on my shopping expenses, but dad?? he just buys me anything and everything that i want. so far, he has rarely turned down my requests. the only problem? both of us have to ask my mum for approval first.
and dad still treats me like i'm a 12 year old girl. i remember once that i wanted to go out with some girlfriends to starbuckcs in town at night. he asked me who my friends were,how long i was going out, when i'm supposed to come back etc. and that was when i was already 23 years old!!!! i got safely back by 10.30pm and both him and my grandma were waiting for me, like i committed robbery or something. but yeah, i love my dad to bits. don't know what i would do without my parents in my life.

mum and dad are going to canada next week, shit,i'm supposed to go to. initially the plan was to go after i graduated, but because my dad is gonna start working again in july, so they decided to go WITHOUT me and my bro. they're gonna visit my aunt in vancouver, visit the rocky mountains n go to seattle. sigh, why can't they wait for me???Anyways, this gives me the perfect excuse as always to ask for things:

1. Narcisco Rodriquez perfume for her.....this perfume smells really sexy.
2. Juicy Couture handbag........this takes a bit more persuasion for them to buy
3. Steve Madden shoes.......i LOVE Steve Madden
4. A watch??? All my watches are breaking down. i need a new replacement

Expected money they'll waste on the above items.....a few hundred US dollars. That's what they get for not bringing me, hah!!

i can't believe i have only 4 days left in surgery posting. as fun as it is, i just have 3 months left before i graduate. we had assessment today, and i was damn scared! i felt like in was in the PolPot regime. its like assessing whether you're stupid or not. i can really feel my face flushing. if you can imagine a deer trapped in headlights, that was how i felt and looked like. Anyways, he said all of us need to buck up. so, everyone is equal lah. i'm so glad its all over. tomorrow i have another round with DK. damn, that's another one i'm scared off. i don't think i'm being over sensitive, but i always kena with lecturers. its either i look dumb, look blur, or i know some stuff. right now i'm not sure which one applies.

i so can't wait to go back to kl this friday. i'm due for some heavy duty shopping, especially shoes n clothes. i went for a brisk walk this evening. i can't imagine how unfit i am. last sat, i also went for a brisk walk, and my calf muscles were in pain the next day. man, that's bad. that has never happened to me. i can't wait to get back to my fit self again. 3 more months........3more months.

i also need a bitching session with my subang cousins, i hope they'll want to see me next weekend. i also miss their tubby sis who eats cheese for a living :) dun worry, she is only 9 years old, she can't beat my ass for saying that.

weekend in kl

so, i finally made my way back to kay-el,courtesy of kkkl express bus. the back n forth trip costs rm 30, and on average is about 4 hours. on fri evening, i used the double decker bus (which has VERY comfortable seats). considering that kl was a jam since the sungai besi toll, the bus driver must have driven really fast to arrive in 4 hrs flat. and that includes a 20 minute break, and dropping off passengers at various points. i arrived at pudu at 9.30 pm and was very irritated with the kl jam. it sucks! and pudu is such a mess. its absolute congestion. the roads were choked with buses, people were walking here and there, it was such a headache to see. arrived in vista about 10, bought dinner outside vista. so by the time i bathed and sat in front of the tv, it was about 11.15. but it was worth it. i havent seen my mom in two months.and even though she told me i didn't have to go back the whole of sem 10, she was pretty happy when i told her i missed her a lot, and i got a peck on the cheek from her :) its hard to believe my mom and i had problems a long time ago. i do think her moving to kl to work was a good thing for me.
i was supposed to start typing my second portfolio on saturday morning, but cannotlah. when in kl, must go out, shop and eat. so sat morning i went for dim sum at sri petaling, then we went to midv to watch forbidden kingdom starring jet li n jacky chan:



the movie is about 6/10, and i watched it solely cos my man jet li is in it. Hey,i really admired the guy when i was in high school. i even had a scrapbook of him. the thing that irritated me in this movie was the fact that they tried to create some love story between the white boy and the asian girl. NOw, i do not like my kungfu movies to have love stories. i mean, the whole reason i watch kungfu movies is for the action, not face sucking. jet's movies like once upon a time in china is a good example. we know, for example that fong sai yuk is in love with miss whateverhernameis,but it ends there. no kissing, no cuddling, no love scenes. this is what happens when white people try to do kungfu movies. i really want to watch a muay thai movie, i just forgot what the title is. i think muay thai is one of the most dangerous forms of martial arts, cos its raw and brutal.

anyways, after that movie, we went to Puma cos mom wanted to buy some clothes. i can't believe puma is as equally expensive as nike and reebok! but the clothes were pretty good. i don't like the sneakers tho. i prefer nike for working out, and adidas for outings. in 2 weeks time, we're having a one week holiday, and i plan to do some major shopping.

i went to church after a long drought. its so good to be in sfx, and being in front of god made me think back of all the wrong things i've done, and try to be a better person. My general observation of people who practice some form of religion is that they are less materialistic, more caring, and more aware of the needs of others. of course there are also atheists who are good people, but so far i have met few.

i went to a steakhouse for dinner, cos i so missed steak. my favourite is ribeye steak,medium done. sanfrancisco steakhouse has really good soups, cos they use lots of cream, not the campbell tin punya soup taste. while waiting for dinner, mom called grandma no 1. seems she's ok after her stroke and AF. the cause? undiagnosed hyperlipidaemia. i really wonder why her dr did not bother to do an annual lipid profile knowing that my granma is at high risk of getting hyperlipidaemia. she has been having hypertension for more than 15 years and is obese. i felt that all could be avoided if the dr were more responsible at her job. anyway, mum laughed really hard at one point in the conversations. seems granny told her she couldn't hear so well, and my aunt who was with her found that she held the phone upside down. LOL
then, it was my turn. she asked me when i'm going back, and that i was the only grandchild that she didn't see when she was in the icu....that made me feel very baaaad. so i told her i will grad in 3 months time, and she can see me. i always feel bad when i can't be around, cos everyone else will be there. its a horrible feeling,i feel like i gave the impression that i couldnt care less, when in fact i do feel very worried, but there's nothing i can do about it.

then, i watched AF at nite, cos my mum wanted to see the 40 year old granny sing (she got booted out). with the new host,the show was a bit better. my parents are still thinking of buying me that damned Chery QQ car. i'd rather get a second hand than Chery. My bro will be getting the Perdana that was originally meant for me. now, i'm trying to convince them to get me either a kenari or kelisa, or better yet, a gen 2. i must convince them, i must........

went back today via kkkl and sat next to my bestie, JMP. i told her i couldn't believe we're gonna finish in 3 months time. its an unbearable wait, but also scary, cos housemanship is scary. still, in 3 months time, i should and will have finished. after 27 years of studying nonstop, i will finally be working. and i'm gonna strive to pass the sem 10 exam cos i'm tired of studyinglah. i don't want to stretch my studies even further. now i must get back to portfolio.

Kluang

I have just about finished my portfolio.suppose to pass up tmr. its 28 pages, and i'm so sick of typing. anyways, i am so loving madonna's new single, 4 minutes, as well as estelle n kanye west's new collabo. i can't get madonna's new song outta my head. its currently spinning like mad on my ipod. the music video is boring though. Miley cyrus made a dance video with the ever gorgeous Channing Tatum. u all can watch it on youtube when u have the time.




Kanyeizzle and estelle in american boy:




and finally, miz Janet Jackson with LUV:




next week, the ever scary and impressive DK will be coming to see us. as much as i miss him, he never fails to terrorize us. i'm just scared of the questions that he will ask. he just loves to ask questions which are not found in the books.
i went to Kluang hospital last tuesday. took about 1 hour from there to BP. the journey itself was fascinating. i love sceneries, and we passed by a lot of kampungs, multinational factories and small districts. there are so many foreign workers here. i spotted vietnamese and bangladeshis, and also some from india. especially along the parit raja area, you suddenly don't feel like you're in malaysia anymore. I have nothing against them, its just eye opening. there was even a certain stretch of road where there was just mist surrounding us as we drove. sigh...very the romantic.
kluang town itself is something like downtown kuching, full of old british shops. The kluang railway station is famous for its roti bakar, but by the time we came around 12pm, it was closed, and only open again at 2.30pm
the hospital itself is small. its been around even before the japanese occupation. we had to go to the male and female surgical wards, outpatient clinic and emergency room.
i wish i could take pics of the hopsital wards. it reminds me of a british army hospital. in the male ward, there was even an arch in the building. if you could imagine scenes of old british war films and their hospitals, well, kluang hospital was something like that. it was not hot because the way it is designed made it very airy. what i find amusing is that relatives/wives would just poke their heads through the ward windows to see how their loved ones are. imagine if your bed is under a window, and you keep finding an unfamiliar face peering at you. creepy....
the female ward, however, was so congested. just stepping into the ward and looking at the entire layout made me feel like i was gasping for breath. the beds are so close together. there is just enough space for 1 person to move around. i cannot imagine how the place is like during ward rounds and visiting hours. it feels like packed tuna.
we went to town for lunch. its kinda hard to choose a place to eat, cos you need to think about everyone. we had banana leaf for lunch, it was not bad. and while having lunch, the astro indian channel was on. They were showing really old indian movies that i hadn't watched in say, about 10 years? its quite interesting, as those old indian movies don't have much dancing segments. its a LOT of fighting and talking.
and on the way to the hospital, i saw an army camp that has a logo of a scorpion on its entrance. i'm really wondering if that camp was just for the special forces, as the army camps i usually see don't have that logo.
anyway, it was a good outing for me. i'll be going there again in another 2 weeks time. if you were to ask me the best part about being in peninsular for many years, its the fact that i get to see other places of malaysia, places that i may have not been able to see if i didn't study here. it shows a slice of rural/old town malaysia.
i would like to go and see kelantan and terengganu. the journey and scenery there must be amazing.

swatch sucks

Today is officially my first weekend in surgery posting. God, i'm always grateful for my weekends now. i thought obs n gynae would be the busiest posting and boy am i wrong. Turns out surgery is worse.
Worse, because i have to stay in the wards from virtually 7-5pm, worse because i have 3 oncalls per week, worse because i have cp's at night, and worse because there are not many cases to have for portfolios. Not many cases to be seen here, but its oklah. one thing i have to be glad about is that my group is allowed to write about any case as long as there are relevant learning issues to be discussed.
Honestly, i am really tired for this posting. mornings in the ward are from 7.30 to 12 pm (with said lecturer deliberately turning up in the wards at 1130 am just to see if the students are there). Then its time for a break, and back to the wards from 2-7 pm (if on call can go back at 5pm). then, we may suddenly have some class in the evenings, say from 5-6.30 pm. Then, if i'm on call that night i have to be back from 8-11 pm. Crazy rite? and don't give me the "you're a HO in training"shit cos' i'm still a med student. i have not had time to study, relying only on my oxford to remember what i have learnt.
Today i went to the ward to check up on my patient who is going to be sent to JB hospital, when our ex IMU senior (IMU shall be known as IMOO from now on) asked me to insert branula for 2 patients. the first was my pt, and i also had to take some blood samples for fbc buse etc. in my excitement i forgot to take of the tourniquet so blood was really oozing fast into the test tubes.i made a bit of a mess on the patient's bed. pt no 2 was an old man, and i thrombosed his blood vessels. IMOO senior had to help me to put the branula on the other hand. then i was asked to take blood from a IVDU. Boy, susah betul nak ambik blood from druggies. their veins are virtually thickened from all the needle injections. i tried twice and gave up. the staff nurse also couldn't do it. IMOO senior once again came to the rescue. Bestnye dapat senior yg nice kan :)
the lesson from today is: its hard taking blood from the elderly and druggies. but i really like our seniors. they are nice to us and just let us do everything, teaching us in the process also. sigh, i am so the happy to get nice seniors :)
then after that, i went for a nasi briyani lunch (so many nasi briyani shops in bp) and proceded to go to bp mall. i wanted to find another pair of shoes, but nothing is nicelar. summit got better choices. so then i went grocery shopping. Guess what, my ikan jelawat is there, and bigger than the previous one. i promised to cook the fish for some friends, just need the right time to do so. bought my mexican ready to cook chicken, salads n my kerang.
Oh yeah, about the swatch thingy. i currently have 2 swatches and both are considered SPOILED. the oldest is only 2 years old. one fell down and the suface was cracked on the way back from swimming, the other one, i dunno what the problem is. i took it to the watch shop, and the people there happily tell me both can't be fixed. shitty lah. i'm frustrated that both are spoiled, as i most probably will be going back to kl in another 4 weeks?? but at the same time glad that i have an excuse to go shopping.
i would probably get a watch from Fossil (cheap n nice), Esprit, Guess or Baby G. The only problem is trying to 'bodek' my mum to buy a good watch for me. i shall try my damndest not to buy another swatch again. Now i have to go and dig out an old watch that i have. its a Fossil, and i still hope it works.
one thing good about bp is that i'm developing more compassion for my patients. there was this one patient who had an MVA, and is currently unconscious and on a ventilator. IMOO senior had to get an ABG from the patient. at the time, both the pt's wife and father were in the room taking care of him. when senior came, both went out of the room and i happened to look at the father's face. it was heartbreaking for me, because i saw despair,hopelesness and also a great love for his son (who's in his 30's). the pt had been there for a few months and has not regained consciousness since then. i suddenly realized that the old man had been there nearly everyday taking care of his son. i feel sad when i think about it. in seremban, i dont really see and think about it because there are so many beds, and the turnover rate is really high. but in bp, life is a bit slow, and if you are aware, there are a lot of things going on. another thing that makes me sad is that the patients here put their ENTIRE trust in the doctors, like listening to everything the doctors say and looking at you as if you are their saviour. a few of the patients i have clerked did that to me, and even though it feels good, in reality i am just a student. its true most of the bp people are not city folk, and it just makes me want to treat them real nice, cos they deserve it, for putting all their faith in the hospital doctors. it also makes me want to work in government, even though i know my life may be shitty due to the work and pay. but i believe its these sort of patients that need the best care available.

Damn i'm stuck in BP

heeeeeeeeeeeeeey, another boring weekend in BP. I have finally finished my obs/gynae posting. i celebrated by going out with my good friends fahzi n squid to a nice cafe somewhere near carrefour to have dinner. i initially wanted to go back to kl this weekend but my mom went back to sarawak. Her mom (granma no. 1) just suffered a stroke a few days ago, and mom is worried. as usual, i was the last of the family to find out. my dad said he sent me an sms, but i never recieved it, i swear! she's doing ok now, but according to my dad she's learning to walk again, and he says she's walking like a crab. don't get pissed with my dad, he's just trying to make me feel less worried.
My parents are actually kinda overprotective of me. i'm usually the last to know about any news (lest it upsets me and my studying) and they usually sweeten any bad news so i dont' worry so much. Add to the fact that i have been barred from driving for the past 7 years, i feel its a bit too much, even though i am the only girl in my family.
i remember once when low cut jeans were the rage, and i was a 2nd year student in um. i went back to kch for a holiday once and happened to wear those jeans. when i came home, i unpacked my suitcase in the living room, and the tips of my undies can be seen because of the jeans. heh, my parents were freakin'angry with me. i was scared, but it was quite funny at the time to see them get angry. if i were to wear g-strings at the time, instead of the usual undies i'd probably give them a heart attack.
Now, i don't wear low cut jeans cos its really uncomfortable (and i've added more fat around the waist). Levi's is still going ahead with their low low waist jeans, and i congratulate any girl who can wear them. i'm still sticking to my bootcut jeans though, cos it makes my butt look good :)
I have finally gone to bp mall and carrefour bp. I'm pretty happy with bp mall. its something like jusco seremban, except its less overcrowded and more shops. i had sushi king, cos i just had the urge to eat raw seafood. the outlet here has the same taste, but less choices. nevertheless,i'm pretty happy (and pretty broke) after eating there. The pacific supermarket is also a god given to this place. the vegies and fish here are really fresh. thanks to my hsemate's microwave,i finally got to eat steamed sultan fish after a long time. THey call the fish jelawat here, but it keeps reminding me of jerawat, and i don't want to think about pimples when i'm eating my beloved fish. if only they built a cinema at the mall, it would complete everything. and no, i have not been to the cinema here.
carrefour is also okay, the usual stuff. what gets me upset is that i can't find my favourite quaker's cereal bars. i have to resort to Nature's valley cereal bars, which i agree are too dry to eat in the mornings. still, any cereal bar is better than no cereal bar at all.
My neighborhood is very safe. the one thing i don't like is when i see dogs being kept just for the sake of guarding the houses. i happened to walk past one particular house this morning on the way to get my morning paper. that house has 3 dogs, which barked and bared their teeth at anyone passing by the house. can you imagine what would happen if they were let loose? i do agree that dogs should take care of the house, but i don't agree that that is their sole purpose. i would prefer to have my pet dogs be friendly and install a complete burglar system rather than to just train them to be ferocious. and i've seen one shop nearby where they keep 3 dogs in a small cage. 2 big dogs and 1 puppy. its so small that they can either just stand or lie down, with no room to move around. and they look so depressed. i wonder why some pet owners can't be considerate enough. even though they are just dogs, but they deserve better treatment than this. even worse are owners who abuse their dogs by tying them to a short leash all day. and in this country, where dogs are considered haram, nothing much is being done to amend animal cruelty laws despite efforts by ngos to do something about it.
oh, and good news!! my fave tv shows are starting again. i've managed to download criminal minds, csi and simpsons. now i'm waiting for the terminator chronicles. thank god the writer's strike is over. not much in the movies, and becos bp is a small town, i've resorted to downloading them via mininova and azureus. i'm gonna start downloading doomsday soon,its ur typical virus attacks earth and produce weird humans kinda movie. i hope i can go back next weekend. my young brother will be back in town. i intend to torment as much of his life as i possibly can.

Im so free from cfcs

Jeebus, i just hate typing. I finally passed up my cfcs this morning, and i'm glad i don't have to see it for the next one more month.just because of the critical review, i spent my whole sunday in front of the pc looking for suitable journals. not to mention haggling over the one and only IMU printer with at least 60 other classmates.

You know what, i hate depending on other people. i hate it that i can't go to hospital on my own, i hate it that i can't go to town on my own, and i hate it when i have to depend on people for stuff. Its not that i hate making human contact, its just that i don't like to trouble other people. And my own feeling that i feel like i'm using people. I don't think anyone will understand how i feel unless they have been very independent for quite a while. So this weekend, i am going to buy my own printer in the hopes that i don't need to ask other people's help to send me to IMU/printing shop/other people's house just to print.

I was very happy in Seremban. Its just a 15 minute walk to school, which i did almost everyday, and getting the added benefit of exercise. And for those of you who have not had early morning walks (aka 6-7 am walks) you should try it. its super nice! There were many shophouses around my area, so looking for essentials like grocery, food, clinic, stationary shops etc was no big deal. AND there is a bus stop which took me to ktm, seremban parade and terminal 1, just in case i wanted to go back to kl or just to go for my mcd's or kfc. Speaking of which, i have NOT HAD both fast foods for about 4 weeks. THat's is long for me. I used to have mcd's once a week. Yeah, i know i'm clogging my arteries, but i was hoping my morning walks would solve a little bit of that problem.

Here in bp, i HAVE NO PLACE TO EXERCISE NEAR MY HOUSE. i'm stuck in my room. Technically, there is a garden just opposite imu, but if i want to exercise there, i will need someone to send me back to my house. See why i'm feeling frustrated now? People have been asking me why i x have a car and why i don't drive. I have a driving license, and i got it when i was 17. Its just that MY PARENTS DON'T WANT ME TO DRIVE. That's just it. Don't ask me why they forbid me to do so. i have no idea. even my brother gets to drive when he comes back home to kuching. Me, i can't even touch the steering wheel of any car that belongs to my parents or my relatives. my brother needs to drive me around town.

I guess i'm frustrated because for once i'm semi independent. Im glad that i have friends who are willing to take me out to eat, send me to hospital or imu and go grocery shopping with me. But there are also times when i wish i had the freedom and accessibility to go out on my own once in a while. Is there a bus service in bp? There is. but it goes straight to the bus terminal and does not pass bp summit. i think i'll just rot in my room for the next few months and try to enjoy myself.

speaking of which,today until this sunday is the freest i've been since coming here. the lecturers are enjoying themselves in Shanghai, and i haven't got my first portfolio back. i still need to look for suitable ebm materials for the first one.


to be honest, i can't wait to get back to sarawak. now i really really want to just go through the next 5 months without any major incidents, pass and just go back. i miss home, i miss my family, i miss my friends and i miss sarawakians. I miss my high school friends. They were the backbone of my life and they still are, even though i don't keep in touch with them very often. in fact, i am guilty of not keeping in touch with them. i think the one reason i stayed so close to them is because even though each and every one of us has our own neurotic personalities, in general we were all behaving the same way: nice, down to earth girls who don't think too highly of themselves, we are comfortable in our own skin, don't twoface or backstab their friends and are very trustworthy (My really close friends anyway). i know i can trust them with my life if i confided something to them, and they can depend on me to do the same thing. ANd i love being with these type of people, u can just relax, be yourself, and nobody gives a damn about you, as long as you are nice. And like i've always said it before, my high school years were and still are the best part of my life :D

Uni was okay, i met a couple of good friends. I've always wondered why are girls always each others best enemies. You seldom see it with guys. In UM, i've seen my own friends backstab another good friend of mine, eventually forcing her to move out of the house in second year. i've seen classmates getting jealous of other classmates achievements, ive seen uber-kiasu ppl in UM, damn, i've seen lots of things. And its usually girl vs girl. Sometimes i wonder what goes on in these girl's minds. What is there to be jealous off? What is there to be bitchy about? I just don't get it sometimes. And the people ive seen hurt are my closest friends. I'm now going to be 27 by the end of this year. And sometimes, trust me, i do feel old. I think i've come to a point where i am beyond all the stupid things i used to do in high school and uni. granted, i'm still not fully mature yet, give me another few more years. Sometimes i'm pretty tired of the drama in life. When i feel really stressed out, i imagine myself just thoughtlessly chain-smoking away, staring at nothing but empty space. That is how i relieve whatever stress i have. No, i have not tried smoking, although i wish i could try one. perhaps when i go back for good, and just try to puff one of my cousins cigs.


in other happier news, my brother told me two weeks ago, that my parents were thinking of buying me car called CHERY QQ. yes, you've heard it rite, CHERY QQ. well, my first reaction was that i was shocked, then i was laughing on the phone for quite some time. The car is made in China and its cheap, in langkawi its price is 18k without tax. in kl its 24K. its a bit bigger than a kancil, and honest to god, it looks like a bug. i so hope they dont buy me that car. i mean i can settle for any car, heck, i've been pestering them to buy me a second hand kenari. my granma has the same car, and its so easy to drive. but a car called CHERY QQ??? when i told my dad about my crushed ego over having to drive a car with a name like that, he also laughed. man, why can't china give non-bimbotic names to their car??? so far, he said he'll buy the car he originally thought of buying for me. i so hope he x change his mind.


My brother has been transferred to Terengganu for 2-3 months for his pilot course before going back to Langkawi. He'll grad in november. i can't believe he and i are going to start work at the same time, and he is 6 years younger than me OK???!!! AND HIS STARTING SALARY IS 4K, FOR JUST STUDYING FOR 2 YEARS. i had to glue my ass to the chair for 5 years just to make sure i pass, and guess what, my starting salary is almost equal to his.

Being a cadet pilot is so relaxing. the first day he was in t'ganu, he was already playing paintball with his classmates. He only has to study for the first year, then for the second year, its all practical stuff. and its a good life. the last time i called him, he said that he flew over the chain of islands just off t'ganu. that must 've been one heck of a beautiful sight. The only thing i can bully him about when he starts working is to get me some stuff, once he starts his overseas flying.

i need to start reading my books. i have not been opening my books for the past 4 weeks because of the ass shitty portfolios. Who the hell said sem 10 was relaxing?

Portfolios r a killer

Its only today that i have begun to feel boredom in batu pahat. They have 1 GSC theatre here that is currently screening 4 movies- dr horton hears a who, anak, 10000 bc and some chinese flick. Today i've been stuck to the chair yet again typing my portfolio. What's that you ask? well, its basically a case i have to type up, from the case summary to history, dx, invx yada yada all the way to evidence based medicine. its a killer cos i can't think of what to write. and i've got to pass up a minimum of 2 portfolios for each posting. That's life in bp for me.
yesterday i had a cfcs discussion that took 3 hours. and i have to finish typing within the coming week,cos i have to pass up on the 25th.

i also just finished my labour ward posting and completed all my supposed deliveries. the last delivery that i did is the most scariest. it was a face presentation with fetal bradycardia. imagine 3 senior nurses with loads of nursing students around you. it was a very very stressful moment for me as i felt how inexperienced i was at that time. and everything had to be done quickly to prevent fetal distress.

another thing i hate is when we have to fight to deliver patients with the nursing students.the moment a patient enters, 4 of them will escort her on her wheelchair all the way to the delivery cubicle. and 4 of them are needed to do a ctg on a patient.
and they have this irritating way of just kepo-ing on your patient when youré not looking. for example, i'll be looking at the patient's case, then when i turn around i see this nursing student timing uterine contractions on my patient, when its not even time to do so? and they will want to do everything, from swabbing the patient to sending the patient back to the ward. sometimes i get so fed up i just do the delivery and let them do the rest of the stuff. the only consolation i get is that they have to take orders from me once i grad :(. granted, not all student nurses are a kiasu lot, i've learnt a thing or two from a number of them. but the majority are a prick in my ass.

I also tried to do suturing of the patient's episiotomy scar, and boy, it aint'easy. i was suppposed to suture the skin, and it took me about 2-3 minutes to do 1 stitch. it made the staff nurse anxious as i was giving more unnecessary pain to my patient. doing it on a model is so easy,its not elastic. its pretty hard to put a suturing needle through skin.

I bought my beloved durians yesterday, 3 big kampung ones for 18 bucks. all 3 were pretty good, only a few fruits were spoiled. i plan to buy durians once a month before i come back to seremban again.

SPM results are out and i found out that a lot of my cousins/relatives are scoring A's like mad! and our nation's highest scorer has a freakin'21A's! Personally, the education dept should stop this. what's the point of getting the most A's? you're not even gonna use 2/3 of the subjects you studied for. I also think its easier to get A/s compared to my time. IN my old days, getting 10 units and below was a pretty big achievement, let alone 9a's. Now the A's are just dropping like flies :) congrats to those who excelled anyways, i just hope you ask rm 10 for an A from your relatives and parents.

The tiniest state in our country is in a dilemma. There are seemingly 2 menteri besars,one chosen by the Sultan, another chosen by the PM. THe way its played out in the media, its like 1 catfight over nothing. And this is exactly why my generation voted so much for the opposition this time around. IF both of them were truly serving the rakyat, they wouldn't even bother to fight for the menteri besar post, just let the sultan and Pm fight it out. But because it comes with power, glamour, mercedes benzes and convoys that stretch for miles, its worth pulling each other's hair out over it, isn't it?

With more opposition in parliament this time, i hope there will be more stimulating debates rather that last year, where the stupidest debate was about whether Air Asia stewardesses skirt's were too short, and the impact it had on men's lust.